this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
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Asklemmy

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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 64 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not being kind to people in the service industry.

[–] MxRemy@lemmy.one 62 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] swan_pr@lemmy.ca 17 points 1 year ago

That's a big one. Also lack of hobbies or passions.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 1 year ago

This is exactly what tanked a potential relationship for me a few years ago.

[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 55 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do people really do that? I just kind of meet people and whatever happens happens.

[–] Palerider@feddit.uk 52 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Maybe you don't like the wording, but everyone does this. Unless you know if someone will be a close friend the moment you lay eyes on them, or are friends with literally everyone you've spent time with.

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For real this seems like a major red flag.

[–] silvercove@lemdro.id 40 points 1 year ago (2 children)
  • Belief in nonsense, such as astrology
  • Celebrity worship
  • Excessive social media usage, especially Twitter
[–] JudahBenHur@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago

you're on lemmy

[–] Blamemeta@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What about excessive lemmy usage?

[–] redballooon@lemm.ee 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That would be really weird. There’s not enough content for excessive Lemmy usage.

[–] MJBrune@beehaw.org 1 points 1 year ago

You can get into long settings on any social media site

[–] bomberesque1@lemm.ee 39 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 38 points 1 year ago
  • Serious belief in pseudosciences
  • Conspiracy theorist
  • Right-wing ideology
  • Sex prude
[–] wontonnoodles@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If they are cheap/stingy but when someone else is paying they get the more expensive things. If someone is consistently frugal in all situations I don't mind.

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[–] mashbooq@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Who are these people who have so many choices in friends that they can afford to vet them?

[–] Dubious_Fart@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago

Its not so much having friends to vet them.

its meeting new people that seem, for all intents and purposes, cool and mellow people.

Then you make the mistake of sending them an off-platform friend request and are quickly brought to realization that the only thing keeping them cool and mellow was the platforms rules and reporting.

I got duped like that once in a game, Kept running into eachother and playing together, so sent them an out of game friend request.. Immediately received a massive tirade about what they really thought about trans people, and gays, and other various topics. 100% unprompted, and out of the blue 0-100 in .00237 second.

The only reason I didnt immediately block them was because I was too stupified and took me a solid minute to gather myself. Ended up having to block them in game, too.. Which I think resulted in them being banned, since they sent me a huge message in game about i must be one of those liberal trans homosexuals since i blocked him after his "truth" or whatever bullshit. Reported his ass, and never saw him again.

Crazy is super good at concealing itself, until it thinks you are a compatriot.

[–] riley0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 1 year ago

Someone who identifies very closely with hustle & grind culture. Someone who claims a personal brand. Someone who kisses up and kicks down.

[–] DirigibleProtein@aussie.zone 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Inability to follow instructions. Lack of problem solving skills. No common sense.

[–] green_witch@beehaw.org 18 points 1 year ago

Anyone who dislikes animals.

[–] redballooon@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Doesn’t speak a language I know.

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[–] nothacking@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Refusing to participate in a civil discussion, but instead resorting to ad hominem (attacking the person not the argument) or refusing to consider the other sides argument. If they do this any minor dispute will escalate to a flame war.

[–] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You probably got machine-corrected, that's ad hominem. But yes, not being able to handle an argument healthily is a big handicap in life

[–] OceanSoap@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

How they treat people who disagree with them politically. If they immediately hate/cut off people for political disagreements, we're not going to be friends any deeper than surface level.

[–] Kanzar@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Depends on the disagreement... if the topic under discussion is as inflammatory as abortion or trans rights, I'm sure you can understand why some folks can't agree to disagree.

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[–] MJBrune@beehaw.org 2 points 1 year ago

Eh it depends on how wrong they are. Perpetuating hate speech? I'm going to cut you off and tell you that you are wrong. Actual politics though, I'll have a conversation.

[–] Dee@lemmings.world 6 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Unimpactful trait? I'd say if they put the toilet paper the wrong way, if you have to ask which way is the right way we can't be friends. Also if they don't return the shopping cart, instant way for me to lose respect for you.

[–] AlternateRoute@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago

Oddly enough your rigity on this is why we could not be friends.

[–] luthis@lemmy.nz 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] vd1n@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Same for any pop media. Some is fine, but if they think every current trending show or movies is "the best" than I know they don't have a system of standard.

[–] EliteCaster@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

If they're boring, then we can't hang

[–] chumbaz@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

If they talk bad about other people, especially if you don’t know the would-be friend very well. If they’ll bad mouth other people to you they’re gonna bad mouth you to other people.