A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
Need more details, but it does seem bad.
without all these details, you probably shouldn't take any advice here as there's a lot of incomplete information.
Please go to the police today. You need help. Your mother is unable or unwilling to protect you. Maybe an older relative can take you in? Wishing you the best.
Probably be better off talking to a teacher once school starts. They are mandatory reporters if abuse is happening. Also there are tools at the school like counselors and potentially support groups that police probably won't have.
Good idea, but this kid needs help NOW.
How old is your brother? How old are you? This sounds like a troll post showing the overreaction of an online audience to recommend the most extreme response because some vital details are missing.
I have to agree. I don't expect many people under 18 on Lemmy, but I might be wrong. For this reason, I will wait to see how the thread develops.
What country do you live in?
Yeah that can't continue. You need to let someone know how bad it's gotten and that your mother won't help you; a teacher you trust, etc. Next time, before it escalates very far if possible, call the police.
Yes, teachers are mandated reporters. They will be able to get the ball rolling.
The cops are unlikely to help you, wherever you are.
Instead, try social services, or a domestic abuse charity, they will be significantly more sympathetic and could potentially offer you support, or at least tools to try and deal with this situation.
The other thing is to protect yourself, go no contact or at least reduce it. It sounds from your short post that you are an adult and live in your own property - don't let him in. If he has a key - change the locks. If he tries to break in then the police might help, try and gather as much evidence as you can (like a camera doorbell or other recording). Don't answer any of his communication, if you can, block/delete him from all of your devices and social media. Personally, I would apply the same to your mother, that's up to you, but it sounds like she's at the very least enabling him, so isn't looking out for your best interests, and you need to ask yourself if those are the kind of people you want in your life.
Life is too short to hang on to toxic people who harm us in the hope that they might change. Being related doesn't make them worthy of your time energy or love. If they do eventually regret their actions and want to apologise and try to make amends, you can let them, or you can choose not to, both are valid.
Take care.
If he's an adult you can call the police.
People have family members arrested all the time.
Beat him up
Been the younger sibling to an abusive 4 year older brother. Beating him up wasn't an option as even small age differences are big regarding strength. All i could do was de-escalate, lock my room (and turn my key slightly because our rooms had the same key shape so he could just push my key out from the outside and unlock it) and hope he doesn't still manage to get in there. I honestly have no advise for this to op :( My situation ended when my brother got drafted to the military for 2 years or so and when he was back he moved out.
I got all my bullies to stop by eventually snapping on them and going for a cheap shot.
In elementary school there was an older guy who would always hit me / push me over - one day I put my knee up when he was diving onto me and got him right in the balls... he quit after that ๐
My more annoying step brother got punched in the face eventually, but we are the same age.
You should sell the house first, establish dominance.
(No but seriously, listen to everybody else :)
Record it. Show it to authorities.
Make this thing clearly know to the police.
I'm sorry to hear that. I'd talk to him for you if I could.
What happens when you try to talk to him? What did he need your phone for? Or was it just to bully you? Maybe he has difficulties expressing his needs.
Have you considered learning self defense or finding friends to help?
It's really frustrating when adults don't help. It sucks that you have to help yourself. You should be able to feel safe and not have to worry about this.
Try relating to your opponent first. Show respect and listen carefully. They might be in a lot of pain and no one is there for them. It's hard and it will test your patience. Think of it like slowing down a ball of anger rolling down a hill. It'll just keep going faster and faster until one of you decides to slow it down.
But after you've done that, you should not tolerate someone who keeps ignoring your boundaries, and make a plan to handle the problem. Stay calm inside and don't hesitate your decisions, and fully commit to your actions.
NAL. Stand your ground and do not put up with him treating you this way. If it starts to get sexual, go to the police.