this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2023
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No Stupid Questions

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I feel like I would make use of it more if I could do it again. Maybe that's weird, I don't know.

Edit; To ask more of a question. What would you do differently?

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[–] littlebluespark@lemmy.world 89 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Frankly, the further one grows past the school age, the more (I've found) one finds that all that was only practice for the actual schooling. Keep getting smarter, and never stop learning! 🤘🏼

[–] otter@lemmy.ca 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I've sometimes thought along the lines of OP, and for me it was thinking about opportunities that were available back then. One could get a better head start in life by doing better in school or applying for the right program, or even just switching to the right career path sooner.

What's nice though is that we might someday want to jump back to where we are right now, and we can take advantage of our current opportunities too :)

[–] littlebluespark@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

To quote a recent bit of dark AF insight: "Kids these days say 'when I grow up, I wanna—' Nah. It's 70F in Dec. You ain't growing up, son."

On the other hand, nostalgia is a golden-haloed liar. The only "good times" are right fucking now. Live your life in the present, not the cherry-picked & misremembered past.

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[–] theblueredditrefugee@lemmy.dbzer0.com 57 points 10 months ago (2 children)

It'd be nice to do the whole childhood over again but with parents who loved me.

[–] TheDoctorDonna@lemmy.world 21 points 10 months ago (2 children)

This is the only thing that would make me say no. I could relive the shitty school years, I could not relive the shitty home years.

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[–] mysoulishome@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

I laughed, then cried

[–] Steve@startrek.website 37 points 10 months ago
[–] Fondots@lemmy.world 34 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Honestly, no.

I learned a lot in school and I retained a hell of a lot of it, but from middle school onward I wasn't a good student because I had absolutely no interest in doing homework, reports, reading the books I was assigned, projects, etc. so I scraped by skipping as much of that as I could.

I ended up in a profession where I don't need a degree, and I'm not rolling in it, but the job security and benefits are amazing (county government job,) I'm making an OK living, I enjoy the work I do as much as I'm capable of enjoying any job, and I'm happy to stick this out until I can retire.

The things I wish I learned better in school are things like trig, which would be nice because I've developed a little interest in things like machining, but would only ever want to pursue that as a hobby, not professionally, so no great loss there. Frankly though, my school's math program sucked and I've probably taught myself more math from casually watching a couple YouTube videos than I would have learned in a decade of high school math classes there.

The things people love to complain about not learning in school- finance, politics, etc. I think I have a pretty solid handle on. Maybe I'm better wired to put those pieces together than they are, maybe my parents did a good job of teaching me that themselves, maybe those people are idiots, maybe some combination of all of those things or none at all.

A lot of my best friends today and even my wife I can trace directly back to sitting next to and goofing off with one guy in a history class at community college before I dropped out. If I'd been a better student I may have gone to a 4-year college, or maybe would have taken different classes, or just fucked around less and never hit it off with him, and my life would be drastically different. It's probably even likely I wouldn't have found the current job that I really like, I stumbled onto it by chance while I was living in an apartment with my wife (then girlfriend) and a roommate.

And without a lot of those life experiences I had in the decade or so after school, I don't know that I'd be able to do the job I do now, I don't think I would have been able to cut it fresh out of high school, I definitely needed those shitty jobs, misadventures, etc. to mold me into the person I am, and I'm overall pretty happy with that person.

Not that there aren't things I'd do differently given the chance, but not enough that I'd want a total do-over. Just give me a chance to go back and slap younger me upside the head once in a while to get him to exercise more or brush our teeth a little more diligently and I'll take it, but there's a lot of mistakes I had to make along the way, and I don't want to interfere with any of those cannon events.

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[–] Daxtron2@startrek.website 26 points 10 months ago

Fuck no that sounds awful

[–] Critical_Insight@feddit.uk 24 points 10 months ago

Fuuck no! While there sure are thing I miss about my childhood and teenage years school isn't one of those. School fucking sucked.

[–] Classy@sh.itjust.works 22 points 10 months ago

Youth is wasted on the young, and wisdom is wasted on the old.

[–] chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What I always think about whenever this sort of question comes up is how it would be super awkward having an adult brain but having to interact with children as peers

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 19 points 10 months ago (1 children)

On one hand I wish I’d handled a lot of it differently and studied more. On the other hand I’m not sure how much I’d realistically have been able to change considering what I needed was medication and accommodations that just weren’t going to happen, so instead I’d just be putting myself into when my trauma happened and being more vulnerable, which doesn’t sound like a great idea.

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[–] astreus@lemmy.ml 17 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (3 children)

With all my knowledge intact? Hell yes! I'd keep all that bitcoin instead of spending tens of thousands of it (about £100) on Silk Road in uni.

[–] danielbln@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

4 Bitcoins for an 8th? Bargain!

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[–] rufus@discuss.tchncs.de 16 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

School? No. University: Maybe.

It's never too late to learn things. Read some books, visit a library and get the standard literature. It's not as easy as if you were learning as a kid, because adults have other things to do and it's difficult to muster up the time... But I still like to broaden my perspective and learn new things. And I admire people who are like 65 and choose to attend some university course or learn a new music instrument.

Turning back time isn't an option. So think about what you actually want and go for it. There probably is a way if you really want to...

[–] wrath_of_grunge@kbin.social 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

when i was about 10 or so we moved to a new neighborhood. obviously that meant exploring the new area, and making new friends. the first people i met in that area lived down the road from me. two of my new friends were brothers, one a bit older than the other, both several years older than me. they had a neighbor, who was my age, and we attended 3rd grade together.

the older brother was a bit wiser and kinder, the younger brother could be a bit bullheaded at times. when i was about 15, i left to live with my dad. those 5 or so years seemed so incredibly formative on my upbringing, for good or bad. around that time the younger brother died in a car wreck, and i really hadn't spent much time with them since i moved away.

to this day, i remember something the older brother taught me, which was to try to learn something new everyday. you won't always succeed, but it's still important to try.

i'm 40. the amount of time i lived there was really only about 1/8th of my life. but i still try to learn something new everyday.

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[–] burliman@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

Hell yes. Go back with all my masterful adult experience and knowledge, so I could own that place. It would be glorious.

Or I’d still get bullied into non existence. Kids are still way meaner than me, even as a grizzled grown up….

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago

Uh, my life is better than when I was a kid.

[–] yamanii@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I don't think it would change much, I have a problem focusing and studying, and 20 years ago ADHD was still a "hit him/yell at him until he studies".

[–] TheInsane42@lemmy.world 13 points 10 months ago

Hell no. School was the worst time of my life, I was glad I could decide to skip school days when the education was hugely lacking and study quietly at home. The school system held me back hugely, as the higher level kids were kept back by the kids strugling. Also the constant bullying at school made me hate being amongst people.

[–] BilboBargains@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago

I would like to do school again but start it with an ADHD diagnosis.

[–] RegalPotoo@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Not school generally, but definitely university. Turns out giving an 18 year old total agency with very little accountability doesn't really set you up for success. I got through (mostly because a close friend kicked my ass), but was a terrible student and am still filling in gaps in my skills a decade later

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[–] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 12 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

No. School was awful.

Of course I would do it, if I could retain my current knowledge and use it to make tons of money. But I guess that is not the point of this question.

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 12 points 10 months ago

No, I imagine I'd be twice as bored the second time around.

[–] Cerise_W@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

I've been in grad school for ten years, I'd choose less school.

[–] tamal3@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

College, yes. I should have done social time separately from education and taken a year or two off. High school, absolutely not. No way.

[–] Evotech@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago (5 children)

Many people would like to go back, but you have to remember how fucking clueless your were as a kid.

You're not going to make better choices somehow

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[–] yokonzo@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

Yes definitely, growing up I had major major fucking ADHD, like to the point where I had a helper follow me around and I would sit after school and cry because I couldn't focus on my homework. If I could go back now, even if I still had to deal with the level of focus issues I had as a kid, I feel like I could use my experience now to power through it and have the success I wanted. Also, I could take up music while I still have a kid brain and shit sticks

[–] boyi@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 10 months ago

I wish to re-live my school life with better career counselling experience. Career counsellors were non-existent during my school years. I supposed, my career path will be a lot less complicated if someone could direct me to the right career based on my inclination instead of me choosing jobs that has nice titles.

[–] pan0wski@infosec.pub 9 points 10 months ago

No, my life is much better now.

[–] HipsterTenZero@dormi.zone 9 points 10 months ago

Nahhh, im good with the childhood trauma ive already got. no need to double down.

[–] OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works 8 points 10 months ago

Yes. But I wish I could go back and experience a real education, in a real school. Instead of being homeschooled by a hardcore evangelical.

Really I wish I could experience the social aspect. I've managed to educate myself pretty sufficiently enough to function in society. People even seem impressed with how smart I am, and are shocked to hear I didn't get a real education. But I can't help but feel like being isolated for the first 18 years of my life left me severely, socially stunted.

[–] cabron_offsets@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I mean, yeah, sorta. I’d probably redo high school and take it semiseriously and get straight As and go to MIT instead of fucking around and getting pretty good but not excellent grades. Then I’d study CS and Econ and be a quant douche and be rich as fuck.

But, I wrote sorta for good reason: had I not followed my particular stochastic path, I wouldn’t have met my wife, I wouldn’t be in bed with my kid right now, while my wife is in bed with the other kid.

So, no. I wouldn’t trade my fortune to be a quant douche.

All else equal? Sure, why not.

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[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

I'd, like, actually study and stuff. I don't necessarily beat myself up for not studying back then. I just don't think I was ready for it.

[–] other_cat@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Fuck no my life didn't start getting decent until my late 20s, and nothing that came before that was in my control to change.

[–] RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Fuck no. I've been through too much shit to start over.

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[–] Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

It's weird, I hated every minute of it and was so glad to see the back of it, but for some reason I find myself sorta day dream wishing for exactly this more frequently than I'd like.

I think my mind has sort of gamified it now and that first run was a bad run that I want to retry. Ironically despite wanting nothing to do with it ever again, I kind of want to relive it not just once but many times over. I'd like to do a run where I pay attention and learn and do very well using my adult skills and accumulated knowledge but I also most want to do a run where I just do a way better job of making friends and having girlfriends and a very active social life in general. I realise how cliché and shallow that is, not least because I'm pitching both those things as opposites which they aren't necessarily and also that that's what I would do with what amounts to time travel when it's so frivolous and trite. But I just, I saw those people in school, effortless social butterflies that people felt good being around and I'd like to have experienced that. I wasn't a hermit or unloved in school, but it was a huge struggle with a lot of pain and rejection and I was so paralyzed by crippling depression and insecurity, I'd just like a glimpse of what experiencing it on easy mode would have been like.

I know the people I'm thinking of that seemed to have an easier time from afar had plenty of problems and probably some insecurities of their own that I just didn't see or appreciate in my little bubble but there was a burden I carried that comes from an extreme lack of confidence that some didn't have to shoulder and I would like to go through that particular period that can be a very special and formative time for a lot of people without so heavy a burden marring it. Second time around I think, that fear and insecurity that plagued everything while I was living through it would be greatly eased.

Then again, if I had to try to deal with cruel teenagers again with my grown up sensibilities I don't know for sure I'd really do much better, teenagers are experts at cruelty and finding your weak points, there's a good chance my confidence would be very quickly shattered leaving me with only the misery of having to go through it all over again. Also, on the point of wanting to have "had girlfriends" as others did, if I'm going back with my adult memories and brain development, well... Yeh that'd be pretty fucked up, I'd probably end up having to forego that except this time by choice.

[–] EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 10 months ago (4 children)

For me it comes down to: knowing what I do now about myself, would I go back and change things?

School sucked. Not only was it often boring and almost killed any enthusiasm I had for learning, but I was one of those kids who never really had to study to at least keep a B average, and it ended up hurting me in the long run. I was able to just coast through school and never developed the skills to study and for being able to fail and get better at something until after I had already given up on college because I had developed a fear of failure and if I couldn't get things right on the first try, I would give up.

I guess I'd go back to start learning how to learn and not be afraid of failure earlier in my life, but there are other things I'd much rather go back for. I heard the word "transgender" for the first time when I was a college freshman. It wouldn't be for another 10 years after that until I could start to really do anything with that information. So yes, I would go back, because I would love to have not spent the entirety of my teens and 20s kind of just existing day to day, going from work to home to work again.

Plus there's so much good music I missed growing up that I would've loved to find when I was younger.

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[–] kraftpudding@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

No way I'd sign up for ever being a child again. That shit sucks even more than adulthood.

[–] Fridgeratr@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

I do wish I could, but this time on anxiety meds. I finally started them a year or so ago and it's been completely life-changing. I can't even imagine how much better my school experience and social life would have been...

[–] Zerlyna@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

I would have gotten an engineering degree instead.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 6 points 10 months ago

I'd go back to highschool and take different classes for a better direction and then actually go to them and do my homework.

[–] Elephant0991@lemmy.bleh.au 6 points 10 months ago

Oh, the horror! I think I did the best I possibly could, given the circumstances.

[–] Deceptichum@kbin.social 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

If I kept all my memories, 100%. I could achieve so much more by building off of what I’ve learnt in this lifetime.

[–] Bahalex@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (3 children)

As my poor old grandad would say :

“I wish that I knew what I know now, When I was younger. I wish that I knew what I know now, When I was stronger”

I laughed at all his words, I thought he was a bitter old man.

He may have been speaking of something else, though, it still applies here I think.

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[–] squiblet@kbin.social 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

The experience was torturous overall, but considering it’s basically time travel and I’d know everything about the future up to 2024, I think I’d do a lot better at everything a second time around. I’d be amazingly good at BASIC and Pascal when I was 7, and would definitely buy that Amiga C compiler this time. I’d be pretty bored with all the 8 and 16 but Sega games since I already played them but I’d also get an SNES, since I missed all that last time. School would be easy af, and i’d feel like a pervert dating middle and high school girls so might as well just test out and get a PhD when I was 12 or something.

Oh, the real question. What would I rather I did differently? I should have spent less time reading my own books and playing video games at home, and focused on the studies school wanted me to do so I could test out and just start taking university courses rather than stay in the slog of middle and high school. Socially it was awful and not sure what I could have done at the time. I ended up dropping out and getting a GED after 9th grade, and did great on the ACT, could have gotten scholarships, but decided to do self employment rather than go to college, which wasn’t a great plan overall due to the specifics of what I chose and what happened.

[–] elscallr@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Self reflection is good. Learning from your mistakes is good. Regret is useless. It's just agonizing over something unchangeable. It's important not to confuse them, lest you end up dwelling on the past and missing the lessons.

[–] AgentGrimstone@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Nope. I would say I had an average school experience but I don't think it's worth reliving. College, however, maybe. If I could do it differently, I would want to make more connections than the first time.

[–] Olhonestjim@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Nope. I've definitely thought about it, but I'd have to put up with living under my parents again, and that would drive me into some very dark places. I'd also feel like a horrible creep if I tried dating again with all my adult experiences. No, reliving high school is not worth it to me.

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