Asklemmy

Your caretaker offers you cake so you kill her. Twice.

Fall really far a lot. Stick sticks to big sticks. Throw fruit to avoid confrontation. Frequent fashion changes. Still can’t pet dogs.

It would have been easier to just fix the crashed ship than to build a whole factory to make a new one

Hit things with fists so that you can hit them with farming implements later on.

You pull animal-like creatures from their natural habitats to make them fight each other in a way that they somehow consent, in a franchise that systematically weeds out the good ideas from each game while retaining the bad ones.

Keep burning to death over and over again as you desperately try to gather knowledge of previous civilizations in order to save(?) the universe.

Experience xenophobia as a lizard-person in a racism simulator

You settle a dispute between two snakes who can't agree on whether or not to turn off the light. Not as many swamp levels as the sequels.

You eat stuff while ghosts try to kill you.

You wake up in a quarrantine zone. Despite having no medical qualifications, you need to cure a global pandemic before you are permitted to leave.

If you manage to succeed, your reward is your life saved and then more debt than you can hope to repay in a thousand lifetimes when you leave quarrantine.

You try to keep smiley faces from turning red until cats inevitably make your game run at 0.2 FPS.

It’s the pew pew game. You go pew pew and everyone is like aaaaargh, and then you take their stuff. Bigger guns, more pew pew.

Very, very flat people open a very, very old door.

Person and person and person don't like other person. The person and person and person work Make other person no have place. Make big word. Person big word person big word other person big word other person.

Make big mad. Many time. Person say big word person. Some person make no person. Make finish person and person and person big no happy, maybe big happy. Make big finish.

Inspired by person do thing

A man gets a scam letter and decides to figure out why he is being catfished.

You're a disenfranchised spacefaring race perpetually performing an, ultimately, menial task in an extremely hostile and dangerous environment. You only exist to create wealth for the company, at the expense of your health and wellbeing. Personal relationships are fleeting as you only interact with strangers you are randomly teamed up with to complete a job at which the company has neither adequately trained or equipped you to do well. Climbing the social ladder in your community is a function of finding ways to more efficiently extract resources from a ripe planet unable to sufficiently defend itself from your advanced technology.

I don't think I followed your prompt, but I got carried a way.

You are the Janitor's assistant.

You leave every single room looking like a literal tornado passed through.

You are, in all probability, the best assistant the janitor has had.

This displeases some of the higher-ups, but they don't seem to be able to do anything to stop you or the janitor.

Another game: God is about to die literally any minute now, but it's probably fine because God is really, really, really fast.

Five assholes, four idiots, and then there's me.

Keep doing the same damn show over and over, the definition of insanity.

Might refer to more games than one, but just let it be.

Because anyway, you eventually lose your humanity.

Just trying to live my life and get with big tiddied Cleopatra. Gandhi comes over and cock blocks me with nukes. That's all right though, my Giant Death Robot is teabagging Delhi right now while I launch a satellite. - Abe Lincoln

A ginger lass fighting with appliances while suffering from aggressive hay fever.

Young scientist with a PhD fucks up scientific experiment

You see an alien peeking around a corner. You know to have a 99% hit chance. You miss.

Man leaves gang, teaches dominatrix how to do her job, gets really good at dancing and finds his love for slot car racing.

A farmer coughs in your face, and then you slowly get sick and eventually die.

Smug accelerating rodent and company gaze on in horror as a mad scientst pisses on the moon.

A girl relies in old emails, social media posts and obsolete sites to understand the reality of the world and avoid murderbots' attempts to destroy everybody.

get things; make things;

I'm looking for a gun that makes holes, but not bullet holes. You'll figure it out.