this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2024
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United States | News & Politics

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[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 97 points 3 months ago (2 children)

How Trump imagines it would be:

Kamala Harris "I am humbled to be the Democratic Party's candidate for President. I accept..."

Announcer "What's this? It's Joe Biden with a steel chair!"

[–] ThePantser@lemmy.world 53 points 3 months ago (4 children)

25 years ago on August 19th 2024, when the Biden threw Harris off "Hell in a Cell" and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcer's table.

[–] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think Harris stole my jumper cables to beat Biden.

RIP RogerSimon10, beaten to death with jumper cables too young...

[–] RCTreeFiddy@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh, how I miss u/shittymorph’s posts.

You can help keep the dream alive. But you have to strive for fidelity.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 3 points 3 months ago

A truly historic moment.

[–] Wogi@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago

Well I mean I would be impressed if he did.

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 45 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I can't tell if his inability to dementedly choke to death on his own tongue is mainly because he's so full of shit that his uvula bounces on a turd trampoline or that he's so used to taking multiple oligarch chodes at once he has no gag reflex.

Either way, it's mildly fascinating.

[–] chknbwl@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago

he's so full of shit that his uvula bounces on a turd trampoline

chef's kiss~ My friend, you are a wordsmith.

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Quill7513 26 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I can’t tell if his inability to dementedly choke to death on his own tongue is mainly because he’s so full of shit that his uvula bounces on a turd trampoline or that he’s so used to taking multiple oligarch chodes at once he has no gag reflex.

Either way, it’s mildly fascinating.

There. I've enloudened it

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 3 months ago

🤣📣💥

[–] CaptObvious@literature.cafe 3 points 3 months ago

We’ll know when we find out who’s paying him hush money

[–] DxK@lemmy.world 43 points 3 months ago

Trump says a lot of stupid and wildly unhinged things but this is a special kind of dumb. The man is in total Narcissistic Collapse and desperately wishes he were still running against Biden.

He’s just so weird and old. Much too weird and old to be President.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 35 points 3 months ago

It's refreshing to see this dickbag actually nervous.

[–] j4k3@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

So egomaniacal every question about someone else is "tell us about yourself but use someone else's name," because these idiots will follow the piper over any cliff.

[–] CaptObvious@literature.cafe 3 points 3 months ago

these idiots will follow the piper over any cliff

If only….

[–] ech@lemm.ee 19 points 3 months ago

He can't imagine Biden not doing that because it's exactly what he would do. Altruism and grace are entirely alien concepts to him. Just the idea of not demanding the spotlight and attention for even one second would make him physically ill.

[–] IntangibleSloth@lemm.ee 19 points 3 months ago

He doesn't know how to campaign against anyone but Joe

[–] JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world 16 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I've said this a few times already, but he sounds like Joker after Batman died

[–] Darohan@lemmy.zip 15 points 3 months ago

Trump pulling a nervous wreck version of the King from Hamilton...

"They say, Joe Biden is yielding his power and stepping away. Is that true? I wasn't aware that was something a person could do"

[–] Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

He thinks this is a wrestling storyline and Biden will return to chair shot Kamala and take back the nomination lol

[–] hddsx@lemmy.ca 7 points 3 months ago

Oh no Trump knows the secret to getting HILLARY back in office. Too bad he thinks it’ll be SLEEPY JOE

[–] MimicJar@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

The only person I'd allow is Bernie Sanders and with a steel chair.