this post was submitted on 29 May 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 266 points 5 months ago (5 children)

Anarchist answer: They're both unisex - bees for pees, birds for turds.

[–] bassomitron@lemmy.world 56 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Hmm... You might be onto something here

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 63 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Yes, this establishment's blacklist.

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[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 183 points 5 months ago (11 children)

Bees have a stinger, and "bird" has been a slang term for a woman (like, what, 1920-1950s?).

Regards, I agree that's needlessly vague, and just about to the point of useless.

[–] dual_sport_dork@lemmy.world 118 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The only bees with stingers are the female ones, though.

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 102 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Fine, Bs represent bra size so that's the women's room, and a cock is a bird, so that's the men's room.

Any way you slice it, these signs don't help.

[–] Kidplayer_666@lemm.ee 68 points 5 months ago (4 children)
[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 62 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I give up I'm going to go piss in the kitchen

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[–] Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works 24 points 5 months ago

So is a Booby

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[–] sjmarf@sh.itjust.works 56 points 5 months ago (1 children)
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[–] grrgyle 22 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Wtf

Alternate comment: I love how you need to internalize 100 years of sexism before you can relieve yourself

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 14 points 5 months ago (6 children)

Harmless old slang terms are now sexist. Got it.

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[–] StrongHorseWeakNeigh@lemmy.world 19 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Although almost all bees you actually ever see are female

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 18 points 5 months ago

You're using logic in a situation where someone has to pee badly.

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[–] Crozekiel@lemmy.zip 121 points 5 months ago (14 children)

Find a member of staff and ask where the "human bathrooms" are. Don't let them leave until they explain. Bonus points if you piss your pants while they are trying to explain.

[–] radicalautonomy@lemmy.world 48 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Look them intensely in the eye as piss streams down your leg to establish dominance.

[–] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 14 points 5 months ago

Better piss on their leg to mark your territory

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 15 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

"Excuse me sir/madam, I am looking for the human bathroom as I need to pour out some liquid from inside of my body through my urethra, something we humans normally do."

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[–] gAlienLifeform@lemmy.world 80 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Doesn't matter, just wash you hands when you're done

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[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 66 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Slang for women is “chicks” and a bit more archaic, “birds” too.

Bees have a…stinger? Dunno about that one.

[–] Gigan@lemmy.world 25 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Aren't most bees female though?

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 19 points 5 months ago

They are. Hence confusion with the signage.

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[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 60 points 5 months ago

Just look for the one with a line (queue) outside.

Or be fair and pee half in each.

Or be chaotic and scrawl "Mammals" on the wall and pee under that.

[–] NoSpiritAnimal@lemmy.world 55 points 5 months ago (8 children)

If you don't have a cloaca you can't use birds

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[–] uservoid1@lemmy.world 53 points 5 months ago (4 children)

If you carry and deposit pollen - use the Bees, if you are laying eggs - use the Birds, else use the floor.

Bees - Male, Birds - Female

[–] ray@sh.itjust.works 34 points 5 months ago (2 children)

But bees also lay eggs, and birds also carry and deposit pollen

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[–] Johanno@feddit.de 13 points 5 months ago (4 children)

But bees are almost only females

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[–] s_s@lemmy.one 52 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Honey this is an Applebee's, shit wherever you want.

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[–] ParabolicMotion@lemmy.world 41 points 5 months ago (16 children)

Why not just make every bathroom a one occupant room? Just because someone has the same genitals as me doesn’t mean I want them to hear me fart.

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[–] Felipe@sh.itjust.works 39 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Bees for pees, birds for tuds.

Can't remember who originally said that but it had me creasing.

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[–] RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 34 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Birds eat worms, so it's down to sexual preference.

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[–] HawlSera@lemm.ee 31 points 5 months ago (6 children)

I seriously don't know what the hell the "Birds and the bees" even refers to beyond an olde movie cliche.

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[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 31 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

OP' was actually meant to take a left, but instead got lost in the back corridors of the local zoo. Regardless of the which door they chose, it ended with a senior first aid officer and a school group being traumatised.

[–] blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world 27 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Women are Bees. Men are Birds. Arrhenotoky OP.

Of the 60,000 bees in a hive, almost 99% of them are female! Female honey bees, or worker bees, make all of the decisions in the hive and do all of the work. There are a couple hundred male bees in a hive, but they don't do much but sit around and eat food.

https://honeystinger.com/blogs/blog/the-anatomy-of-a-hive

[–] A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 17 points 5 months ago (13 children)

Thats a little to common sense for the average American.

I'd wager bees are boys, for bathroom purposes, cause boys have a "stinger"

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[–] vox@sopuli.xyz 24 points 5 months ago (5 children)

this is how i feel when a website presents me with a gender prompt with only two options

[–] radicalautonomy@lemmy.world 17 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Or when a webform requires an honorific and none of them is suitable. (I'll usually pick "Honorable")

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[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 19 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (6 children)

The British call women "birds" sometimes. Idk.

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[–] francisfordpoopola@lemmy.world 18 points 5 months ago

I'm going in and committing to whatever I find inside.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 15 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Bees have stingers, birds have peckers..

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[–] wabafee@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago

Neither unless your a bee or a bird.

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