They're not warm blooded. Maybe they're flamingos.
this post was submitted on 26 May 2024
258 points (100.0% liked)
Jokes and Humor
6210 readers
203 users here now
A broad community for text and image based jokes, humor, and memes.
This community's icon was made by Aaron Schneider, under the CC-BY-NC-SA 4.0 license.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
And they produce dairy-free milk, whereas mammal milk is definitely of the dairy variety.
Is human milk a dairy product?
Human milk certainly contains Lactose and Whey Protein.
But is it a dairy product?
I just gave you a pretty succinct definition of Dairy. Yes.
Google shows conflicting answers and the Wikipedia page doesn't list human milk.
Well if you go by FDA's Title 21 Chapter I Subchapter B Part 131 Subpart B then not only is human milk not a dairy product but the only animal who produces milk is a cow, however in 2018 they requested submissions weighing in on whether plant products should continue to use "dairy group" words such as milk and yogurt on their labeling, so I think there is probably some leeway on this.
the only animal who produces milk is a cow
Some kids are gonna go hungry, no goats milk for ewes.
And we all know how trustworthy Google Search is...
Not actually using Google, just using it as a generic term for search.
Yes, but it's pretty difficult to buy.
It's not actually especially difficult. People who produce more than their kid needs will sell or give away the extra to people who are struggling to produce enough. Also... Some hardcore body builders buy it as well.
There's apparently also breastmilk ice-cream!
Also, beware the diseases. Milk can spread virus AFAIK.
They’re not warm blooded.
depends on the climate. natural habitat: yes. grocery store: no.
By definition, "warm blooded" means "produce their own heat" (obviously drastically simplified). I don't think it matters whether the coconut is on a deserted island or on the shelf at Woollies, it's still not warm blooded.
What if it's on fire, using it's own energy to produce the heat?
As I'm burning I'm the happiest I've ever been. I'm finally mammal.
-the coconut
I mean, that sounds like poikilothermy to me
They don’t secrete a filtered blood derived substance through modified sweat glands, thus not milk producing, nearly milk substitute producing.
Wild thought, vampires that drink milk instead of blood.
you mean like human babies?
Fuck. I'm a milk vampire.
Mampire?
Mamapire.
Neither Coconuts nor Oats have Mammary Exocrine Glands
I heard that in Sheldon Coopers voice.
Behold, a man!
You can milk any animal that has nipples... but, do coconuts have nipples?!
I rest my case 😎
I have nipples @jarfil@beehaw.org , could you milk me?
Is not about the nips, but the mammary glands.
Mammals aren't "living organisms with fur and milk". They're "the most recent common ancestor of the echidna and the cat, and anything descended from that".
Whoa, so cats came from coconuts?
Then why are there still coconuts? Check mate atheists
Proof that humans and coconuts lived together. Suck it science!
echidna I understand, but why cat?
The actual definition is "monotremes and placental mammals". I just picked one of each.
You can milk a cat, that checks out.
Nah, coconuts don't have the right kind of teeth and ear bones.
While "having fur and producing milk" may have been the original description of mammals, biology no longer classifies things that way.
Today, all of the classification is based on Clades, which can be established by doing DNA investigation (similarity matching). So, "mammals" are defined as a clade. And whether somebody falls into it or not depends on their DNA similarity. And coconut clearly do not belong into there.
Geez I thought we left the coconut fuckers back at the place which may not be named.
In this essay I will
coconuts are plants and you're an idiot
you’re an idiot
Name-calling isn't nice. Remember to be(e) nice at Beehaw. Consider this a warning.
JEEZ ok
But "idiot" isn't a name, i guess?
/jk Sorry, I'll show myself out.
gasp!
[ clutches pearls ]
I agree
Vegans hate this one weird trick