askmenover30

Wait you guys still have friends?

Maybe every other month. I'm happily a childless bachelor. My friends have wives, and some have kids. I'd like to see them more often, but their obligations hinder that.

I've begun trying to find and/or reconnect with friends who aren't as socially hindered, to fill the gaps.

Friends?

I'm so ~~mackerel~~ knackered after work I barely have time to see my wife

See? Very rarely.

But we play D&D online together twice a week or so and keep up with each other in a discord.

Married, almost 50, no kids.

I'm 37 with a wife and two kids. I'm fortunate that I see friends quite often. Several times a week, actually.

It's so important to schedule time for socializing as we get older. We can't take it for granted like when we're young; it often needs to be planned in advance. Being a member of a religious community or special interest group more or less guarantees that there's always a social event coming up.

I highly recommend guys who are feeling lonely to look into local groups according to their interests. You'll be surprised how many other people also want friends outside of work but don't know how to get it started.

Well,

1. same thing as probably a lot of people here: a lot of the friends of my youth are not in my vicinity anymore, we've grown apart and it feels wrong to consider them friends at this point.
2. The ones I still am close with: about once a month, I'd say. But we hang out on discord more often than that.

Rarely. My good, non-work friends don't live near me. Two are about two hours away, another across the country. We see the closer ones every few months, usually for very short visits.

I do have a few coworkers who've become good friends, I see them much more often. We all work remote now, but we're still in the area. Most of them to get drinks weekly, but I don't have the chance because of my kids. I do try to get lunch with some of them every couple weeks.

Not in person, but the ones still there like a couple of times every year

I've got two young kids and a 45 hour a week job. Simply put; I don't.

Certain friends only every two or three months. Others about every one or two months. Everyone is busy having lives and families and jobs.

A lot less than I would like. My best friends maybe once a month or two, other friends once or twice a year. In my twenties we would all see each other a few times a week. People have moved to different cities, had families or are generally to tired from work or have lots of commitments. Also, covid really fucked the routine of seeing friends often. It definitely made me more reclusive.

Weekly when I lived near them.

Once every couple weeks in real life.

Every day on discord :P

I have an unusual work schedule, and I appreciate my online friends very much

Far less than is optimal. I work a lot, and when I'm not working, I'm too tired to do much else. My best mate and I used to hang out once a week or so, drinking more than a few beers whilst playing video games or watching dumb shit on YouTube. It was great, but life just got busy. I'll see him once a year, maybe twice if I'm lucky. It also doesn't help that I'm neurodivergent, so the percentage of people I develop genuine personal chemistry with is very low.

Not fun, but eh. I'm making money.

I'm very lucky to have grown up in a neighborhood with a ton of guys around my age. There are 10 of us from the ages of 29-35. I've known all these guys for 20+ years and consider them my brothers. A few of them moved away so I unfortunately don't see them often but we still talk regularly. The rest of us just had kids or have had their second kid and we all have careers. We get together maybe once a month when time permits sometimes it's a bit longer but we try and make a point to get together with the whole family as our kids are all months to a year apart in age. We all talk a fair amount in group chats and also play games together when we can. It's not like when we were in our 20s that's for sure. A few of us rented a house and we were always together having a good time. Growing up is weird. We are all very different people now with our own lives and problems but any of us would drop everything for one another if someone was in need. I love them all dearly. It's super cool that our kids will get to grow up with one another and hopefully be as good of friends with each other as we are. I consider myself so lucky to have so many friends I consider family. A lot of people don't have one best friend. I was blessed with 9.

Back in my 30s I would typically see some combination them - all of us were single - 2 or 3 times a week: in the pub, dropping round, out to see a film, out for a meal, poetry society, wildlife volunteering etc etc.

A couple of decades on I am married but they are all still single. They don't see each other nearly as often, it seems, but I'll meet them as a group only once every couple of months. I may meet one or another for some reason every few weeks though.

In my case, I don't have children yet, so I can see friends once a week. I expect this to change drastically once we have them, but for now we still have some time for ourselves.

Several times a week