this post was submitted on 02 Dec 2024
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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 62 points 2 weeks ago
[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 17 points 2 weeks ago

He came not to be served, but to serve...

...,you your own ass!

[–] kubica@fedia.io 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"Turn the other cheek" practice.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

A man only has two cheeks. After that, it's clobbering time!

[–] LordCrom@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Whenever some asks 'What would Jesus do?' remind them that whipping a bitch is on the table.

[–] mehdi_benadel@lemmy.balamb.fr 9 points 2 weeks ago

He gonna be distributing PAIN

[–] ATDA@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

The ACTUAL first miracle was turning gym bottles into cans of whoop ass.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 6 points 2 weeks ago

Show up at 6:00 to find out!

[–] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

And on the 7th day, god said, "I'm going to beat the living shit out of you, bro"

[–] aviationeast@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No on the Eighth day God said, the first rule about fight club is you do not talk about fight club.

[–] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Gonna kick your ass after church dude, because you're wrong

[–] aviationeast@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

See ya next Monday.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

LOL, idk why this made me laugh so hard, but it really did. Well done.

[–] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 6 points 2 weeks ago

Oh… fighting huh.

[–] InvisibleHat@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It’s for a 13 person gangbang, Last Supper reenactment.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

"Put this piece of me in your mouth and drink my bodily fluids."

[–] Zier@fedia.io 2 points 2 weeks ago

No! It's a wine & sushi party. And he walks on water for your entertainment.

[–] Codandchips@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Fightin' the good fight

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

This fahking guy keeps trying to kiss my cheeks again! Cmon man! Its 6pm! I'll see you outside in the parking lot!

[–] Monstrosity@lemm.ee 1 points 2 weeks ago