this post was submitted on 04 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Irremarkable@fedia.io 239 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Anon discovers eating healthy and exercising.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 43 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Don't forget the beard.

The beard hides an ugly jaw, I know from experience.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

I try to improve the days of strangers by offering compliments that (hopefully) clearly have no ulterior motive. The two easiest ways I've found to do this are a. Offer the compliment in passing so that it is obvious I'm not asking for anything as a follow-up because I've already walked away and b. Compliment things that took time, effort or courage (like an elaborate hairstyle or colorful makeup).

Metaphorically speaking as a man with a beard, I appreciate men with beards because the man in question is often very pleased with his beard and, in most cases, took time to develop it. Therefore, it's nearly universally a safe thing to compliment. I've never once complimented a beard and not gotten a grin and at least brief conversation as a result. Sometimes I'll even get a brotherly slap on the back.

Maybe OP got a lot of - or even a few - compliments on his beard, regardless of the state of his jaw, and it boosted his ego.

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The best non-creepy way I've found to compliment a random woman is "That's a great look."

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

I usually just talk about something very unlikely to sound predatory or sexual. "I like your hair," things like that. Hair is one I bring up frequently also because one can usually tell whether a lot of effort was made; as I mentioned, I think complimenting something that involved effort is more impactful than just random, possibly meaningless things about the person.

For example, I don't usually say anything about clothes (on men or women) unless there's something particularly striking about them; recently I saw a woman wearing a shirt expressing a political opinion that is not popular in this area (but with which I agreed) and complimented her on it because it seemed like it probably took courage to wear. However, I wouldn't comment on someone wearing a plain white tee.

I have learned that I don't necessarily always enunciate properly and therefore should say "I like your shoes" rather than "I like your boots."

As a man with a somewhat shorter full beard, though not thin by any means. I take a decent bit of pride in it cause even in its most dhaggy state it requires a decent bit of maintenance with grooming to keep it from ingrowing and knotting.

So yeah any compliment is appreciated keep up the good work.

So long as the beard isn't also ugly

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 107 points 1 week ago (1 children)

He's not really committing until he starts spending his summers at war against a neighboring Polis.

[–] smokinliver@sopuli.xyz 42 points 1 week ago (1 children)

...together with his gay lover

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 13 points 1 week ago

And possibly being paid by Persians

[–] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 96 points 1 week ago

Greekmaxing

[–] Deadeyegai@lemmy.world 49 points 1 week ago

But there is quite nothing like sunning your freshly shorn scrote.

Fake: Annon took inspiration from the Greeks by being fit

Gay: Annon took inspiration from the Greeks by being extremely gay

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 27 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] Taalen@lemmy.world 36 points 1 week ago

If it's the only thing you drink, price adds up fast.

[–] iheartneopets@lemm.ee 24 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Ancient wine was actually not very good

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It was potent though, had to water it down.

[–] figjam@midwest.social 1 points 1 week ago

Adding dirty water to clean booze is gross

[–] hector@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago

Its spiciness sounds appealing though

[–] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago

OP forgot to take inflation into account.

[–] manuallybreathing@lemmy.ml 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 1 week ago (1 children)

How bout I take a propa ganda at them honkers

[–] manuallybreathing@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 week ago

Disgusting.

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I initially misread "garlic" as "garum" and immediately felt bad for the neighbors.

[–] TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

fermented fish sauce right?

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

That was banned from being made within the city walls from the smell.

[–] pinkystew@reddthat.com 10 points 1 week ago (3 children)

why is "interest from women" the last item? anon claims Greek lifestyle but ignores that the ancient Greeks normalized homosexual behavior? .

It's a funny meme but it reeks of ignorance and entitlement.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 41 points 1 week ago (2 children)

So you're saying OP is ignorant and entitled because he didn't choose to be gay?

Normalization of homosexual behaviour doesn't imply heterosexual behaviour was non-existent. Helen of Troy was known for her beauty, not her lack of cock.

Also, the Greeks still exist today, so at least some of them were into women.

[–] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Helen of Troy was known for her beauty, not her lack of cock.

Rule34 is rapidly approaching your location

[–] Fox@pawb.social 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Does futanari count as rule 63 or is it its own thing?

[–] Fox@pawb.social 5 points 1 week ago

I think Rule 63 is just gender-swapping

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

So you're saying OP is ignorant and entitled because he didn't choose to be gay?

I am.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Because they were already enjoying the interest from men?

[–] Goldmage263@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago

Exactly. The OP did normalize it. There wasn't a notable difference.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 12 points 1 week ago

It's because it's fake and gay

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world -2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Cuck Carlson suns his tiny balls.

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago (1 children)

LOL GUYS HE BROUGHT UP POLITICS

It’s insane that ball sunning is political but here we are.