this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2024
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Sex, from a physical standpoint, is very overrated, and being a virgin does not actually mean anything. Stop overthinking it.
Good sex is not overrated. It can be immensely satisfying, fun, and romantic, depending on what one is into. It's not for everyone, but for some, once you find the right sexual match and develop some experience with it, it can be so great. It's also very healthy for people to have a good sex life.
"A good sex life" will vary and be different for all.
Sure, but that has little to do with virginity. Tons of people lose their virginity in one night stands or bad relationships with forgettable to awful sex. If your only goal is to lose your virginity you’re not on the right path to having a great relationship.
Fun and romance aren't physical attributes. Sex is great when you're doing it with someone you have a deep connection with, when you're feeling close and connected with that person when you do it. It's intimate not because of the sex itself but the feelings you share for each other. That's what makes it great sex. From a pure physical standpoint I'd say masturbation is much better.
Is not only about the sex but also having a meaningful enough relationship to want to do it with that person
If it's not only about the sex, why was the sex the first (and only) thing you reached for?
So you have someone you get along with really well, and instead of being happy about that you whine (and yes, this is whining) about them not having sex with you.
Your focus is on sex and that's the only thing you can change: your focus.
I never said this was my only and first thought but it is part of the topic of the conversation and it is something that crosses my mind but its not the main thing I think about when I'm getting to get to know someone
You didn't say it. You showed it. Of all the things you could mention about meeting people you got along with and enjoyed spending time with, you complained they wouldn't sex you up.
That tells me where your focus is.
You know what? Women can tell when the guy sitting across from us is thinking about us as chiefly a pile of meat that they want to fuck.
That's also not something you can enforce. Don't meet people with the outlook of them becoming your partner. The best relationships are those where you know that person for a long time and have a bond with already. So find ways to make friends instead and just let things happen when they happen.