No Stupid Questions
No such thing. Ask away!
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People on reddit used to think I was lying about stuff I did in my youth, because nobody would do those things today. I absolutely did them. I wasn't on drugs, most of the time, I'm just a weird person who stopped giving a FUUUUUUUCK about people in kindergarten when I gave Tim Caldwell a teenage mutant ninja turtles fruit pie....and he FUCKING THREW IT ON THE GROUND!!!! I'm sorry, you do NOT throw a 1980s green ooze TMNT hostess fruit pie ON THE FUCKING GROUND when a fat kid gives you one! You treasure that shit, that he thought highly enough of you to give you one! It was at that moment I realized that other people do no matter. I'm the greatest human being alive, and I no longer need to worry about other people or the consequences of my actions.
So I threw my pants down, threw him to the ground, and sat on his face. Nothing sexual. I was 5. So was he. I was just humiliating him on the school yard, by shoving my butt in his face.
But on reddit, they would say things like "Pics or it didn't happen!". And I would reply "Let me get this straight....you want me to send you pictures of my bare ass when I was 5 years old? Even if those pictures existed, sending them, or even having them in my OWN possesion would be highly illegal!"
They didn't think that through. But I'm not a troll. I'm just an idiot.
Based purely on this comment alone. You seem to have the most fitting username I've ever seen. That was wild read lol. Thanks for the laugh.
Is it concerning that me reading your comment didn't narrow it down WHICH comment you were replying to AT ALL for me? 100% of the time I need to click the context button to know whatevery anyone is talking about. My comments range from the politically divisive, to the absurdist satire, to stories of days gone by......and any story involving me is already going to be weird.
Drag likes you and likes weird.
Was the lonely island skit based on your life story? 😜