Dad Jokes

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151 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
loopy@lemmy.world
listing: all - local
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Post text, images, or direct links only (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
5 comments fedilink
 
 

Please see the updated sidebar. Do not post external links to websites such as Facebook and Instagram.

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Please post edgier jokes to the new Uncle Jokes community (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
11 comments fedilink
 
 

I just updated the sidebar. As a rule of thumb, if you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you should probably post it to the new community !unclejokes@lemmy.world

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so I'm at my favorite fictional club, and I ask the DJ to put on a specific Classical Composer's music (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 day ago by Usernameblankface@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
4 comments fedilink
 
 

He says he can't. I'm so bummed.

This club can't even Handel me right now

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Do you want to hear two short jokes and a long joke? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 day ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
4 comments fedilink
 
 

Joke, joke, jooooooooooke.

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What did Spock find in the bathroom? (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 days ago by PopcornPrincess@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
5 comments fedilink
 
 

The Captain’s log

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Why don't pirates shower before walking the plank? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 2 days ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
1 comments fedilink
 
 

They'll just wash up on shore later.

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Why do pirates make such good debaters? (feddit.uk)
submitted 2 days ago by Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
4 comments fedilink
 
 

Because they just love to arrrrrrrgue!

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Why do elephants paint their toenails red? (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 2 days ago by Susaga@sh.itjust.works to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
11 comments fedilink
 
 

So they can hide in cherry trees.

Alright, why don't you ever see elephants hiding in cherry trees?

Because they're very good at it.

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What do you call a man with no shins? (lemm.ee)
submitted 2 days ago by antisoma@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
10 comments fedilink
 
 

Tony

Bonus - What do you call a religious man with no ankles? Shinto

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What do you call a hippie's wife? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 3 days ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
4 comments fedilink
 
 

Mississippi.

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Someone accused my dog of chasing them on a bike (lemmy.world)
submitted 3 days ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
2 comments fedilink
 
 

My dog said, they're lying I don't even have a bike!

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My doctor said I can't go in the water for two weeks after my surgery. (lemm.ee)
submitted 3 days ago by Please_Do_Not@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
2 comments fedilink
 
 

I said that's ok, Doc, I prune up after just a few hours.

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How do you cross crocodile river with only a rubber band? (lemmy.world)
submitted 3 days ago by owenfromcanada@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
13 comments fedilink
 
 

Just swim across--the crocodiles are still at the meeting.

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Goblin (slrpnk.net)
submitted 6 days ago by admin@lemmy.haley.io to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
8 comments fedilink
 
 

cross-posted from: https://slrpnk.net/post/13365174

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What did the minivan name her baby? (lemmy.world)
submitted 6 days ago by ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
8 comments fedilink
 
 

Carson.

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Would you like to donate to my charity, CAWCAWCAWCAW? (reddthat.com)
submitted 6 days ago by God_Is_Love@reddthat.com to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
6 comments fedilink
 
 

It's four good caws!

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All the animals on the African savanna got together for a meeting (lemmy.world)
submitted 5 days ago by owenfromcanada@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
7 comments fedilink
 
 

but they couldn't start because someone was missing. Who was it?

It was the giraffe. It's still stuck in the fridge.

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How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 week ago by owenfromcanada@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
6 comments fedilink
 
 

Open the door, remove the elephant, put the giraffe in the fridge, then close the door.

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How do you fit an elephant in a refrigerator? (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 week ago by owenfromcanada@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
26 comments fedilink
 
 

Open the door, put the elephant into the refrigerator, and close the door.

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Why is a pirate ant dangerous? (feddit.nl)
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by Akasazh@feddit.nl to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
0 comments fedilink
 
 

He's a sail ant

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What kind of pants do psychics wear? (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 week ago by jordanlund@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
7 comments fedilink
 
 

Paranormal pants.

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surprising (aus.social)
submitted 1 week ago by Moah@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
1 comments fedilink
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What did the cannibal have for his last meal? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 week ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
7 comments fedilink
 
 

Five Guys.

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Talking about sexuality (files.catbox.moe)
submitted 1 week ago by Deebster@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
11 comments fedilink
 
 

cross-posted from: https://lemm.ee/post/42084543

Talking about sexruleity

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🧑‍🤝‍🧑👬👭 (feddit.nl)
submitted 1 week ago by eldain@feddit.nl to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
25 comments fedilink
 
 
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