I'm in both, but I'm a Reddit refugee looking for a similar experience. 99% of my Reddit's time was through the RIF app and Jeroba looks and feels the same, so currently I only use lemmy.
I wouldn't mind switching over to kbin if it gets better in the future since I can read everything from anywhere.
I feel you, man.
I'm 29 and in your same exact situation. I'm constantly reminded that I'm alone and the world isn't made for single men. The harder I try the stronger the depression hits back since all my efforts are meaningless. And each time I talk to someone about it I just get the most cliche responses.
I've just completely given up on love and accepted that I'll be alone the rest of my life. Since it looks like it won't be better, at least I don't want it to be worse...
Switch the flashlight mode to UV light to look for stains