this post was submitted on 28 May 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Fizz@lemmy.nz 143 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Npc waiting for someone to interact with them. Someone tell him he can make things happen himself.

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 39 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] ClockworkOtter@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

From empathy?

[–] Baku@aussie.zone 9 points 5 months ago

Ironically when I want to be an NPC nobody interacts with, people decide to start interacting with me 🤦‍♂️

[–] PrinceWith999Enemies@lemmy.world 77 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Come on Brian, cheer up!

I mean, what have you got to lose? You know, you come from nothing You're going back to nothing What have you lost? Nothing!

Always look on the bright side of life!

[–] RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 58 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Honestly, nothing happening is better than something bad happening.

[–] paddirn@lemmy.world 40 points 5 months ago

Yeah, the alternative to a boring life for most people probably involves some amount of tragedy or hardship. If their life is boring and nothing bad is happening, then they’re either making at least semi-smart decisions and/or they’re not surrounded by total fuck-ups dragging them down.

[–] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Is it really though? If you go out an embarrass yourself it's not the end of the world. You're far better off making a fool of yourself a few times and making some friends than staying inside all day and only talking to strangers on the internet.

[–] RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 34 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Well, I wouldn't consider something embarrassing something bad. I had more in mind something like getting in a train wreck or a victim of crime. Those are some pretty bad things that would certainly be worse than nothing.

[–] Droggelbecher@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago

That's the extreme, sure. But everyone has a different amount of risk that they're willing to take in order to break up the boredom. For some, the line is putting yourself out there and risking embarrassment, for some it's motorcycling, for some it's alcohol/other drugs, for some it's wing suits. But some amount of something bad happening is usually worth it if the alternative is nothing at all happening.

[–] sorghum@sh.itjust.works 45 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

in elementary

12 years

I've identified the problem, op was held back in elementary school until he was 17

[–] 257m@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 months ago

probably counting preschool

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 41 points 5 months ago

I too am an NPC.

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 35 points 5 months ago

"I'm turning 30 and I've never been challenged to go on a quest. I'm begging to think I'm not the protagonist."

[–] Bonsoir@lemmy.ca 33 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

"Just wait until you meet a special someone", they said. "It will all come together", they said.
Yeah, right. You have to socialize for that, and there's no guarantee you'll find anyone anyway.

[–] Randelung@lemmy.world 24 points 5 months ago

That shit is all survivorship bias.

[–] dudinax@programming.dev 31 points 5 months ago (1 children)

My God, doesn't anon realize how lucky he's been?

[–] VeganCheesecake@lemmy.blahaj.zone 28 points 5 months ago (1 children)

If you are depressed and find your life monotone and unfulfilling (which I don't know about them, but if you make a post like that on 4chan, that might be an indicator), knowing your relative privilege probably won't make you happier.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 21 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Life is nothing, and then you die and experience more nothing.

[–] Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Oh? There's really nothing to it.

🤭

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Life is nothing and then you DON'T DIE.

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Oh you die, but a big part of that is after this phrase, none of the following phrases can contain the word "experience".

[–] Samsy@lemmy.ml 20 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Why not doing risky stuff, I don't mean paragliding or base jumping. Maybe start with talking to someone else.

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Or being all he can be in the Army! Ends up being a paper pusher there too.

[–] Karyoplasma@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I know a guy who wanted to volunteer to go to Iraq and, after assessment, the army said no. He was working as a paper pusher and was apparently so bad at his job that they didn't even want him as cannon fodder.

[–] Kalothar@lemmy.ca 7 points 5 months ago

Because the army is about teamwork or else you get others killed too.

Cant have a guy like that in a line unit going out, no can rely on him.

[–] Avatar_of_Self@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

If it was around the time of 9/11, in the US military, we had a bunch of people wanting to sign up and be all patriotic. We didn't really have a people problem in OIF/OEF but unfortunately for the Army they had a budget problem. There were equipment shortages for stuff like the armor inserts for the PASGTs and the like. Marines always have a shortage of everything but now they really needed it.

Support the Troops was really Support the Defense Contractor contracts.

Also, I'd like to let everyone know the US is all Support the Troops but Fuck the Vets. I don't give a shit about one free bland meal at Golden Corral a year and $3 off of a $30 pizza. We need better VA services, we need the VA to be able to 'recognize' a lot more of service connected problems with an infrastructure to take care of it.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

I work at a paragliding/hanggliding club. Both are very safe. Give them a try. They're both awesome.

[–] Ibaudia@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

skill issue

[–] Avatar_of_Self@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago (1 children)

AKA "I'm not social with anyone and try to keep my distance away from everyone. Why won't anyone even talk to me?"

[–] 257m@sh.itjust.works 9 points 5 months ago

I don't think it is a call for other people to talk to him. You are assuming too much from literally nothing. He never said in the post that he goes out of his way to keep away from people at all.

[–] KeenFlame@feddit.nu 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Tried dating apps now for a couple of weeks, had very low expectations from all this whine but.. I have so many fun and interesting people talk to me every day and meet some of them and it's the kind of most fun I have had in my life? What are other guys doing, it seems everyone I talk to express how glad they are that I wasn't an asshole to them? I just talk like a normal person and it seems every other guy is harassing or being wierd to them?

[–] Starkstruck@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago

I think it's safe to assume the op from 4chan was being weird to them.

[–] Wanderer@lemm.ee 2 points 5 months ago

Sounds like he needs a trip to mexico to do blow and hookers.