A piece of paper with instructions:
Use your tablet to take photos of your home. All rooms, and how and where you sleep. Make sure to remove the scuffed up plastic lens cover first.
At the next visit at the doctor, ask her to talk with her privately. Tell her about your living conditions, show her the photos as evidence. Don't be scared of her, she's actually a nice person. She'll try to help you.
Your mom will be mad, but most likely it's going to be worth it. Help your dad with the clean-up, I am pretty sure he's going to be the one doing that.
Oh, by the way, if you haven't yet done so, don't give your dad neigbor's WiFi password. He'll absolutely juice it by watching HD movies, and they'll get an "unexplainably" higher bill.
Also, don't get a dog. You won't have enough time for him in the future. Just get the fish.
For middle school, definitely don't listen to your dad about there being no "normal kids", go to the A grade. If your results are good enough, why not?
Lastly, here's a gift. Something you wanted so much you stole it from Tesco.
Provided with the note is something better than just the hand crank flashlight I stole. A hand crank radio + flashlight combo!