this post was submitted on 11 Dec 2024
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Lemmy reacts to a non-sexualized silly outfit pic in a totally normal way…

Previous posts in this series…

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[–] qaz@lemmy.world 128 points 1 week ago (2 children)

If people act like that on 196, please report it

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 44 points 1 week ago

goated mod 👑

[–] moss@lemmy.blahaj.zone 24 points 1 week ago
[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 80 points 1 week ago (19 children)

"Italians do it better" is an intentional double entendre, so I feel moving to a more sexual commentary is not wholly out of the ballpark of reasonableness.

Fuck "Is this your first day on the internet" response, though, and the other two weird comments.

We really 95% male here, though? I thought it was more like 70-30.

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[–] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 55 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Those are yucky comments anywhere other than an lemmynsfw community or a community with a suggestive name. I can't glean much context from this screenshot of the post but in general, I believe horniness should be kept to horny online places.

We can and should do much better than that.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 20 points 1 week ago

based and kindnesspilled

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[–] Th4tGuyII@fedia.io 48 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Related to the previous posts bit, but I remember first seeing the Man vs. Bear memes.

I'll admit it was hard not to take it personally at first, because even if you agreed with the core of the message, it feels like you're being lumped in with the worst of menkind for no good reason. That's probably why the reaction was so toxic, because people just replied with their gut reaction, which was to take offence...

But upon giving it a bit of thought, I realised that as a guy who's lived in some dodgy areas, I think I too would oftentimes prefer to take my chances with a bear than alone with a stranger at night - not cause I think I'd beat the bear, but at least you know what the bear's probably gonna do...

And if I feel that way being a man, then considering (on average) women are weaker than men of the same build, I can see why women would feel that way too.

[–] dragonfucker@lemmy.nz 26 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (4 children)

Indian metal band Bloodywood has the best take on the "all men" issue:

Not all men?
Yes all men!
Need all men for what we're solving
Can't be what it's been but we're evolving

The patriarchy privileges every man, which means every man needs to fight the system. If every man who hears the message and isn't an abuser stands up and does something, we can end the patriarchy. It's not "every man is guilty", it's "every man is responsible, and we can end it together."

And the rest of the song is about punching rapists.

[–] TrousersMcPants@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I agree with this and I have absolutely no desire to undermine the problems that women face. However I think it is also important to understand how many men also feel oppressed by the patriarchy as well. Obviously women have been and continue to be oppressed to a far greater and much more literal degree, but so many men feel this immense pressure to "be a man." This frustration at feeling inadequate because of these immense pressures is what makes so many men as dangerous and unpredictable as they are. I really think this is a major part of the issue, we need more men to stand up and realize that they don't have to conform to some shitty societal idea of what masculinity should be, same as how women have been fighting against their own traditional gender roles. Any man who can feel secure in being himself regardless of society's expectations should help the men in his life to understand the same. Maybe then we'd have less insecure, dangerous men running around.

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[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

this is so sick ty for sharing

[–] dragonfucker@lemmy.nz 13 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Fuck every man for himself
It's every man for every man
And everybody else
Everybody else

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[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 1 week ago

it feels like you are being lumped in with the worst of menkind for no good reason.

Before I realized I was trans I also got super upset at being lumped in with bad men (although with an additional different reason that I didn't understand at the time), and that feeling is absolutely terrible, because you're basically getting shit on just for existing.

From my perspective as a woman it seems like there are a lot of shitty dudes out there. After I realizing I'm trans it became a lot easier to notice misogyny since it now affects me. I did notice before, but when something affects you specifically you notice it a lot more. I also didn't fully understand how weak women are compared to men until I started taking estrogen. Just being near a man I don't know well or at all is very scary because of how easily he could overpower me.

If I am getting a random bear vs a random man I would definitely take the bear just because I feel like the risk of getting a bad man is too high. If I could pick a specific man, I definitely would pick my father or a friend because I know they are good men and I feel safe around them.

I think some outrage could have been avoided if the question was worded just a bit better, although I think part of why it got so popular is because of the outrage it caused.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 11 points 1 week ago

hell yeah dude. it’s an uncomfortable conclusion to draw, but it’s an uncomfortable reality we live in.

[–] Wutchilli@feddit.org 37 points 1 week ago

Love getting the wakeup call that just because something is part of the fediverse it is not inherently good or perfekt and still needs work (in regards of the humans that join)

[–] NickwithaC@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago

Shit misogynists say

[–] Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone 24 points 1 week ago (2 children)

The men ain't sending their best, folks.

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!lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world has a big problem with openly misogynistic users making “jokes” in the comments.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 1 week ago (6 children)

I feel like it depends on the instance, .world is mostly male liberals (who will occasionally act sexist) while Blahaj.zone is mostly Transfem :3

(Btw I wouldnt tolerate any of those comments on c/Trans)

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[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 17 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Oh shit, I've seen this (yours) post a few hours ago, but just now I noticed that's Lemmy...
I thought that was from Reddit at first.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

i miss [bigotry showcase] it made me feel like i was on the sane part of the internet

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[–] lseif@sopuli.xyz 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

thats what happens when you build a community with a large percentage of shut-in nerds and software devs (speaking as one of the latter)

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 9 points 1 week ago

yeah, i try to think of it as an opportunity. i usually try to focus my efforts on encouraging growth and recognizing the hurt thats caused.

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[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Which instance was this on?

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

!lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world which someone else said has a problem with this sort of thing. wasn’t personally aware it was localized.

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

.world users suck compared to blahaj.zone. With .ml, you get tankies, but with .world, you get more transphobes and lib normies. I spend all my time here, getting shocked by what's normalized when I visit other instances. The people here can be horny, but are much more likely to respect boundaries if told.

[–] GeneralEmergency@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

Something something bear

[–] 2ugly2live@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I love all these comments like this woman is asking, cares, or is even interested. "I totally probably would." Okay, but would she??? Why do they think this woman wants to be someone's last call when she could be someone's first choice? If I looked at a picture of a regular guy and my fat ass was like, "Hmm, I mean, if I was drunk, and I had no options, I guess I'd take him home" I'd be dragged, and rightfully so. 😂

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 10 points 1 week ago

the guy who made that comment is in this post right now saying “you don’t know the women or NBs i associate with [or if i make them uncomfortable]”

meanwhile in this post are several women and NBs saying “yeah that made me uncomfortable” 😭 listening to women is hard for misogynistic actors i guess.

fortunately the mods over at !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world are doing their job to wack this guy.

[–] Aggravationstation@feddit.uk 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Has that picture cropped off the S or a comma?

Is it "Italians do it better" or "Italian, do it better'

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 9 points 1 week ago

it’s the full plural “italians” like in the madonna music video

What the fuck?

[–] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago (2 children)

What happens when you group all chronically online nerds in one place (twice not going outside and talking to girls)

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 24 points 1 week ago (3 children)

tbh put some respect on the name of chronically online nerds- that describes like a ton of my friends who would never say this shit lmao

these guys are like a really sad subsection of that group

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