Asklemmy

That's a pretty reasonable misunderstanding, I don't speak for anyone but myself but generally as long as there's no malice involved I'm not upset by an accidental misgendering.

I'm on jerboa too and didn't even know there were specific pronouns on accounts, I just chucked mine in my bio.

I personally try to avoid gendered language, but if I do use it, I tend to check their profile-bio :)

Uh, yes, but its a mutual misunderstanding from both sides...

Its an honest mistake and I think if you appealed the ban you'd have a good case for it, however as you now know that's the trans flag you can be more mindful in future :)

Using a client that shows the pronouns in hexbear is good and it sounds like you are doing that now.

As a follow up, I recommend approaching gender just as one would if they were bring mindful with new people. If you don't know pronouns, using they/them is a fine way to start referring to someone neutrally. You can also just use their name. It is considerate to then figure out what they prefer in a non-awkward way, either by how others talk or by just asking them nicely. Having pronouns displayed by names is just helpful for clarity and speeding things up online.

i would block all those people and move forward with my life

No, it shouldn't necessarily be an expectation to check. However, if you don't then I think it's a reasonable expectation to not gender someone one way or another unless you do know or are corrected, using they/them and other neutral ways of referring to someone like person etc is the best idea if you can't or don't feel up to checking.

Generally I wouldn't take that kind of thing too seriously from hexbears they love conflict and actively seek it out

Sometimes moderation is ridiculous. More “zealous” moderation teams just strike everyone relentlessly. Usually the kind of people that make boomers label every young people as snowflakes

Back when I was on Reddit, on the LTT subreddit, I started reading rumours that formerly known as Anthony (I am here meming with the whole X ordeal), had transitioned into Emily, and I checked the website sorta confused. I thought it was just a mistake or a joke until I saw it actually confirmed. So I did that whole party meme with me at the corner not realising that he had transitioned into she, and everyone else already having congratulated her. This got me banned.

I just checked the apps I use, and sync shows display names properly.

when unsure or lazy i use they/them