this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 255 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

He sucked 100 dicks and with that knowledge and experience in the end he finally chose hers.

Remember that.

[–] DarkThoughts@fedia.io 74 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Either way I feel it's more important how many dicks they sucked after entering the relationship.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 21 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I personally don't want to know about before and won 't ask, but that's up to everyone's personal relationship standards.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago (8 children)

My wife and I were both open about ours, and being open about it made trusting easier. I'm not sure who would have an problem knowing approximate numbers unless they have jealousy issues or are judgy.

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[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 30 points 2 weeks ago

When you're bi curious, but you also respect the scientific method and so you require a large sample size to make an informed decision.

[–] SynonymousStoat@lemmy.world 155 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)
[–] medusa@sh.itjust.works 93 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 35 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] neatchee@lemmy.world 40 points 2 weeks ago

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

[–] djsoren19@yiffit.net 28 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

It's written almost as if he did it the night before the wedding, which would be an impressive trick for a bachelor party.

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[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Just bring her lasagna at work. She'll get over it.

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[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 86 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

It's not dick sucking quantity that matters, but dick sucking quality

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 31 points 2 weeks ago

"I swear I really went for it, babe. I was buckling knees..."

[–] ByteOnBikes 23 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Hard disagree. It's about optimizing the dick sucking.

I'm betting if you line three guys into a triangle, you can suck three dicks at once.

This will allow you hit 99 dicks in only 33 sucking motions.

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah if you have a jaw that can be unhinged like a snake.

[–] frezik@midwest.social 12 points 2 weeks ago

Quantity has a quality all its own. Jumps into pile of dicks.

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[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 63 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

He sucked their dicks, but did he suck their hearts?

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

He he he, first orgasm, then organ harvesting

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[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 57 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

It’s surprisingly not that hard to put up those kinds of numbers. It does not matter your gender or physical appearance, you can find at least one hundred guys willing to let you suck their dick.

[–] ByteOnBikes 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm afraid to test your theory.

[–] NewAgeOldPerson@lemmy.world 36 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you do test their theory, get tested often.

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[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 12 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

My experience on Grindr says otherwise.

[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Sometimes you’ve gotta be brave enough to check out the blank profiles lol.

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[–] ntma@lemm.ee 52 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

When I first got together with my wife she insisted that neither of us share with each other of our past relationships or sexual experiences. I was fine with it because I always believed in the ignorance is bliss mantra for certain circumstances. After about a decade of marriage and a couple of kids she starts asking and stuff. I didn't really want to share but she told me about how she had a threesome while in college a couple of times. I did admit that I was a bit jealous. She also told me that she slept around a lot in college and that her count was like 50-60 she can't really remember. But then she asked about mine and that's when I told her about the escorts. That's when she got mad about me telling her about my past.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 103 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

that’s when I told her about the escorts.

Jesus Christ, never admit that you drove a Ford.

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[–] Ibaudia@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago

I mean... it's probably good to talk about these things before getting married, since it will inevitably lead to unresolved feelings later on. I wouldn't mind if, for instance, my partner was a slut while I was a sexless virgin before we got together, but I would at least want to know that about them. In my mind you're supposed to talk about your life experiences with your partner, and sex is falls under that umbrella. Idk, maybe I'm weird for thinking that.

[–] NeptuneOrbit@lemmy.world 29 points 2 weeks ago (10 children)

As long as it wasn't in a row

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 36 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Are you envisaging a sort of grid arrangement?

[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago

No a spiral. Makes the ol’ suck and tug much easier.

[–] DScratch@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago

Sequential list, surely. Though maybe you could suck off the current and .next at the same time.

[–] BartyDeCanter@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 2 weeks ago

What if was in a column?

[–] Moops@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Don't kink shame me!

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[–] lefixxx@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago

She's just upset because her number is so low comparingly

[–] Mango@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

How do you get 100+ people to let you suck their dicks? Asking for a friend.

[–] slacktoid@lemmy.ml 29 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

You ask politely one at a time.

Doesn't have to be polite all the time either.

[–] ByteOnBikes 23 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] originalucifer@moist.catsweat.com 20 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

i just cant imagine giving a shit about this. like how insecure do you have to be after 16 years to care??

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 51 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

The joke is after 16 years finding out your husband is into cock.

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[–] raynethackery@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Well, I mean, as long as you made enough to afford the engagement ring.

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