this post was submitted on 01 May 2024
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Asklemmy
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Boromir. Right before the arrows start flying. We would just sit at a bar drinking after I'd calmed him down, and we'd read how the hobbits got taken by Orcs anyway and that Sam and Frodo are pretty much doing their own thing.
(We would also have the "Seen Been"/ "Shaun Bonn" discussion, time permitting)
Skip ahead to the last book where the ~~King~~ Steward of Gondor sits on the throne, and then I'll pat Boromir encourangingly on the back, and shove him back into the book so he can connect with his dad again.
I also might throw in some AK-47s for that last battle in the last book, but depends how much I've been drinking honesty
Sean Bean is a stage name. His birth name? Shaun Bean.
Pronounced "Seen Been"
Seen Baun.
well that's just ridiculous now
You can't return them to the book, taking them out is permanent.
Oh. Well, still Boromir before the arrows. At that point he's basically written out of the story anyway.
I can find him work petitioning the Tolkien estate to include firearms in their final battle, which they will likely refuse because they are dicks. I guess he could go on celebrity panel shows, but I don't think he'd be that funny.
Pulling him out of the book really might do more harm than good. He died with courage. Now he just mysteriously vanished when he was needed the most. Probably the ~~King~~ Steward of Rohan would be suspicious on his son's disappearance, and would reject any plea for aid fr the Fellowship. Might doom the story.
I am terribly sorry to brung this up, but you've now suggested twice that Boromir is connected to the king of Rohan which isn't the case. I believe you mean to say Steward of Gondor because Gondor has no king and Gondor needs no king.
goddammit I knew that too