Asklemmy

43757 readers

1486 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
!lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

188

How do I start same-sex dating and romance? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

32 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I've been fighting off writing this for a while now. I even considered making a throwaway for it, but I guess if its too embarrassing I can delete it.

I've sorta come to accept I'm bi in recent years, and I am wondering how I should go about dating and courtship in regards to dating within my same sex (male). Especially since I find femininity to be a key attraction point. I also haven't dated or had sex in like, three years or more. Its been a while, I kinda stopped caring for myself and focused on work, I am slowly trying to become an interesting person again, get back in shape but its hard. I dunno, man. I'm in my mid-30s and I am trying to figure out what I want out of the world. There's a bit of lust involved. And I definitely need a hug at the very least.

Furthermore, I live in the Southern part of the US, and the amount of trans hate has me actively wanting out of here (I'm aiming for Colorado) and dating in this part of the Southeast is already difficult as is, in my prior experiences.

How does one navigate this kind of world after coming out? How do I deal with the stigma especially since in the states, there's a renewed interest in putting people back in the closet?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee -1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I was giving my addition to the two cents everyone was giving here, nothing necessarily "necessary" about it; I relatedly did not come with any guarantee of helpfulness, and if by "unnecessary" you mean to imply it was somehow hurtful/destructive to suggest the semantics of how the Southern US ought to be rebuilt, I would've never predicted that in a hundred years. I was providing some of the thoughts I have when unwanted people like those homophobes and transphobes march on my world (and yes, I too am LGBT). It is theft. What do you do in response to said theft?

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

As a trans person who fled the south many years ago because I saw the writing on the wall, you do whatever you have to do to keep yourself safe. And you help the people that need it. You don’t finger wag at them for not doing enough to fix the shit driving them to flee.

[–] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 0 points 6 months ago

Point to what part of what I said constitutes finger wagging or accusing someone of not doing everything they might.

If so much is at stake, there would then seem to be a deeper issue at hand, one relating to the peacekeepers.