Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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It can be hard being an alien, but learning how to interface with people and navigating the bizarre world can be a rewarding (if at times exhausting) endeavor. I wouldn't place disconnect in terms of blame, though it is easy to do so - better to think of it neutrally, as information to help orient yourself.
I find when I blame myself and get caught up in being wrong I have a harder time staying emotionally aware and doing the right things, so even if just for pragmatic reasons it is good to be easy on yourself.
It's more important to be going the right direction and to persist, to have an element of quick recovery and trying again, than to punish yourself for failures. It's even less useful when the failures are caused in part or by whole by the conditions you are in rather than the way you are; for example, if you were on-time according to a schedule but the bus didn't follow the schedule, it's good to know that you might have to come earlier than the schedule says to eliminate that possibility of missing the bus, but it is also reasonable for you to follow the schedule and it's not entirely on you that you missed the bus.
Either way, sounds like you are on the right track and doing a great job considering your circumstances, and that's the best anyone can do. Exploring the city and riding the bus to get more familiar is really smart, it's much better to miss the bus and learn the lesson under these circumstances than when the consequences might be worse (like if missing the bus made you miss a job interview, or something like that).
So, well done, you're doing great!
I don't really mean "my fault" like I'm sorry for what I am, just that I'm out of place here and not fitting into this ridiculous world of hunams (apparently I'm Spathi now so I call them that ๐ ) smoothly, easily. I like to think that I'm not sorry in the least for anything about myself that isn't a wrong choice I've made, and kinda pride myself on that. No one should be sorry for existing but anyone who causes avoidable harm should seek to change. It's a pretty simple rule that I think serves well as a kind of root, most basic kind of thing for living life: if you're hurting someone, stop. If you're not, then do you.
As for the bus thing, yeah, that's the idea :3 Partly struggling with my anxiety problems but also just learning how to get around and having a chance to directly see and experience some of the city. Getting some idea of how to get around, how to get to and from places, how to use apps (mostly Google Maps <.<) to guide myself, figure out when and where and how I'm gonna have to wait for buses, how to orient myself and pick and board the right bus (as opposed to the left one, which has the same number but a different letter and goes the other way)... Making the mistakes on the way to/from Taco Bell was most definitely part of the point nodnod I really do not want to have to figure out all' the basics en route to something important because even little oopses can totally ruin me. Anxiety's still hellish, though :-\
Thankies!