kofe

joined 1 year ago
[–] kofe@lemmy.world 3 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

I wasn't arguing it isn't harmful. I'm just interested how there's so much public effort to go after it but seemingly not alcohol even a bit.

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 4 points 18 hours ago (7 children)

Is alcohol still legal? Afaik at this point we have more evidence to the dangers of alcohol than vaping

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 10 points 19 hours ago (2 children)
[–] kofe@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

We're the most social creatures on the planet. It may not sway anyone, but it could help keep moral up for those of us more at risk for skipping from sheer depression or apathy.

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

The amount of passive aggression I expressed in my teens like this was too damn high. I've kept my Facebook but haven't posted in years and have been systematically hiding posts as they pop up in my memories page.

I'm still working on it, but y'all, I suggest if you struggle like I do with people pleasing, take a day or two to consider if it is worth directly bringing up to someone. Sometimes that silence or passive aggression becomes enabling. We can't expect people to care about hurting our feelings if we don't learn to express that hurt in healthy ways

Note: this only applies for those that can accept healthy communication of hurt feelings and adjust their behavior. If you communicate directly that you were hurt and the person doesn't care, fuck em

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Which is why we're also seeing entire maternity wards shut down. Doctors can't provide care without risking being jailed or being sued for malpractice, so they just won't practice at all.

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I mean, as a woman in my 30s, same. I'm not worried about it or anything, like if I meet someone that's great, but why stress over it? Dating is supposed to be fun. If you're stressing out, take a break. There's no rush. I say that knowing I only have so much time left to have kids, but again, stressing over it doesn't help

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago

Imagine telling women who have experienced extreme violence that your solution for them is further violence. I cannot own a gun for my mental health. We can protect everyone by working to prevent violence.

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

I was reinforcing the request. I did a couple general prompts with your claim and think there's some research to support it, though it's not much; and, as with anything, there's nuance.

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

Shit, I only have two songs so far. Let me rephrase: requests are necessary

[–] kofe@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

Well hey, good news! She wants to raise the minimum wage, too. But I see that as a side step, as well. Stronger worker/union rights overall would be ideal.

351
fuck the manosphere (lemmy.world)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by kofe@lemmy.world to c/casualconversation@lemmy.world
 

I just want to vent a bit - I started seeing someone a few weeks ago. Old fling that I ran into through some friends that got rekindled, and I was excited that it seemed like more than just casual hookups this time. But there were some yellow flags I ignored that turned out to be red flags, and now I'm feeling frustrated and hurt.

Dude for real dropped the line that men are more "capable" and "logical" on me. That gender studies are "indoctrination." I told him we should probably stop seeing each other if that's really what he thinks. It wouldn't be logical for me to keep seeing someone that thinks lesser of me, now, would it?

I'm grateful to have some guy friends that I turned to after I left, cuz I wanted to go into "fuck all men" mode, but I know it's not true or helpful. Just like there are women out there that have internalized misogyny, there's feminist men, enbies, etc. We're all just people and we're not monoliths beholden to differences in biology. This is just sexist, manosphere bullshit in particular

Anyway. I'm still feeling angry and wanted to put it out there for some support and solidarity. Anyone have a recent win they'd like to share or something?

ETA: Thank you so much for the conversation y'all! I've been trying to keep up but I gotta get some sleep. I'll check in later but hope everyone has a good day. Keep up the empowerment! 💜

 

I know it's not the most engaging or thought provoking question, but I'm having a bad day and would really like to find a space to vent

 

I was noot prepared for this intensity

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