this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2024
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Hey friends, I just sent the text coming out to my job. With that, I am officially out to everyone that it realistically matters, and the weight off my chest even before a response is immeasurable.

This marks the real beginning of my new life, and is the start to 2024 that I wanted. Next up is HRT, one step at a time.

Love you all

-Nikki πŸ’–

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[–] Zymii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 10 months ago

Being able to be who you really are at work is such a huge thing. I'm really happy for you!

[–] sleepdrifter@startrek.website 16 points 10 months ago
[–] ProfessorYakkington@lemmy.ml 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don’t know you but I am proud of you. I am only out to a few people as NB and the thought of coming out to my coworkers is particularly scary for some reason. Thanks for the inspiration.

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Hey, sorry to bug you but how did you know you were NB? It's been on my mind lately and I'm not sure if I'm non binary or just can't be bothered with masculinity and want to distance myself from it

[–] ProfessorYakkington@lemmy.ml 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

No worries. Honestly , this is a pretty hard question to answer. I've always been NB, but for a long time I didn't have the 'words' or 'desire' to acknowledge it. For me it is very much a combination of 'feeling' and 'philosophy' -- It started as an acknowledgment that I was pretending a lot , mostly to try and fit into gendered social circles. For me I wasn't pretending to be male or female , I was pretending to be either. Once I acknowledge that I was pretending to feel and like or not feel and not like specific things to fit into social structures I started to be more honest with myself and actually be open to who I am. It was and continues to be a Journey. Very similar to you I realized that I "can't be bothered with [socially] constructed masculinity or the version of masculinity my family expected from me and started distancing myself." At first I distanced toward Fem but that didn't work for me either -- it does for a lot of people , many of which are probably here and I am absolutely in love with the fact that it does work for them and inspired to continue figuring out my own truth. Eventually , I was really tired of not 'knowing' where I fit and just decided to not give a F*** and set everything aside and embrace my non-definable-self. This worked for me and was a literal weight off my shoulders. It just feels right for me. I call this NB. Others do it differently.

I feel bad going off topic to NB stuff in this thread/community meant to celebrate and unite TransFem ( I love my chosen family and community ) but also didn't want to not respond to you given all of this stuff is hard and we all need support. Happy to answer more questions in Direct Messages if you want. Hope this is helpful : )

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago

Thanks, I appreciate it! I felt a bit off throwing a comment up in this thread as well given the context but it was on my mind a lot yesterday (I'm reading gender trouble right now haha) and I felt the urge so I went with it. I may DM you in a bit if I remember, I'm at work rn and things are starting to pick up. Thank you again, have a good one!

[–] LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 10 months ago

Congrats Nikki :) I hope it goes great!

[–] violetraven@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 10 months ago

Damn, Nikki, look at you go! Congrats on doing it. I know how hard and stressful those initial first steps can be

[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

Congratulations! :)

[–] Jimbob0i0@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Congrats! That's a huge step... one I know all to well from my own recent experiences.

Hope all goes well for you ❀️

[–] TGhost@lemmy.ml 7 points 10 months ago

You are the best !!

Keep going on, and good luck !

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 10 months ago

Congrats! Hopefully it goes well for you.

[–] kellyaster@kbin.social 7 points 10 months ago

Congrats! Heck of a relief, isn't it? I did the same last month. Cheers to 2024!

[–] Nikki@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

I cant reply to everyone, so I'd just like to thank all of you for the kind words ❀️

[–] ThePJN@sopuli.xyz 5 points 10 months ago

Woo! Go Nikki go! 🀟

[–] Jackie_meaiii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 10 months ago

So excited for you Nikki!! (⁠぀⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)⁠぀🩷✨

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 5 points 10 months ago

Congratulations! I hope 2024 treats you well

[–] narwhalperson@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 10 months ago