this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2023
648 points (96.3% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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top 34 comments
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[–] ElBarto@sh.itjust.works 30 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] OhFudgeBars@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago (2 children)

It's coming out the wrong end of the phone.

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

No, it's just held upside down. For some reason I think the concave but goes by the ear and the flat bit is spoken into.

Now I've written it, it doesn't make sense, but I'm pretty sure I'm correct - long conversations weren't comfortable against the ear (because of the ring?)

[–] Valmond@lemmy.mindoki.com 4 points 11 months ago

And where is the cable?

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Upvotes. Suddenly realizes “Nobody Lately” 😔

[–] 0x4E4F@infosec.pub 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You got a great cock man... and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@sh.itjust.works 11 points 11 months ago
[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 10 points 11 months ago

Thanks, needed that today.

[–] fossphi@lemm.ee 10 points 11 months ago

It ain't much, but it's honest work

[–] 0x4E4F@infosec.pub 9 points 11 months ago

Thanks 🥹.

[–] RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Stamets@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

I have my ways

[–] MasterNerd@lemm.ee 8 points 11 months ago

Thank you 🥹

[–] pigup@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago
[–] applebusch@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Thanks. I made it myself.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Why did I hear this as a whisper?

[–] tias@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 11 months ago

Why did you hear it at all?

[–] sagrotan@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Thanks. But my hens are a sight of beauty, too.

[–] doingthestuff@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How would anyone say that when no one but me has seen my cock in years?

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 11 months ago

NSA: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–] Jubei_K_08@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

It needed to be said. It's well received around these parts.

[–] miss_brainfart@lemmy.ml 5 points 11 months ago

You can have it if you want to, I don't really need it

[–] UraniumBlazer@lemm.ee 5 points 11 months ago

Thanks bro <3

[–] EvilEyedPanda@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Opitech@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago
[–] bruhduh@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago
[–] amio@kbin.social 2 points 11 months ago

Thanks bro, very considerate &lt;3

[–] TheDeepState@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago
[–] chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Mango@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

The comments were there at first but when I tabbed to a different app and back it said comments were turned off. Anyone else see them?

[–] clark@midwest.social 1 points 11 months ago

Am woman. What do I do now?