this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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[–] IsThisLemmyOpen@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'll choose to go back a few minutes so I can stop myself from getting sucked into the time portal...

[–] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Congrats, you are now stuck in a few minute time loop. Enjoy your new hell.

[–] spizzat2@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Dormammu, I've come to bargain!

[–] atimholt@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Dormammu, I’ve come to bargain!

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[–] TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub 17 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Four hours from now, because then I'd be off work for the day.

So you'd basically be gone for 4 hours? Not that I would recommend it but do you have a bathroom at your company?

Think big, how about 28 hours so you're off work for the weekend instead of just the day?

[–] UprisingVoltage@feddit.it 3 points 1 year ago

The real answer

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It said era, so I assume "modern" could just as well land you in 2006 Iraq.

[–] TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I mean, it's also time travel, not location travel, so I'd be most likely to end up in space and die almost instantly.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Depends what reference frame you're using. If you're following an inertial frame backwards through time you're most likely to end up deep inside the Earth, actually, because that would put you in a sort of orbit.

[–] TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't think that's any better.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It's not. The good news is it's sucking you in like a high pressure opening doesn't, and at least your end isn't falling, so that's probably not how the magic works.

The other trope-based possibility is it leaves you roughly where you geographically are in your new era. That's limiting as hell if you're somewhere with a short history like I am, which I guess is another argument to go recent.

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[–] kthxbye_reddit@feddit.de 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Smart dudes posting to jump to pre-Bitcoin times coming in 3-2-1

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You know, there's a variety of assets you could get in on the ground floor with.

[–] bitsplease@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago

And the smart move would be to spread it around anyways, no telling what a sizeable investment in - for instance - Apple might have had early on, maybe it would change history so that it didn't turn out successful

Better to do some bitcoin, some of each major stock you can recall, and funds for industries you know will take off

[–] ShakeThatYam@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I always think it would be cool to visit some historical moment. Then I remember I'm not white and that I would not be having a very good time.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 year ago

You've just got to pick carefully. Race (as in skin colour as the determining factor for group identity) was invented in the 17th century, so before that you're just a foreigner like the rest of us would be. After that, yes, avoiding Europe and European-inspired places is recommended.

[–] TheBananaKing@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

1: Ten seconds from now, I have shit to do.

2: A week ago. "I bet you a billion dollars that sub implodes..."

[–] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

1990s A.D. so I can enjoy the great music whilst also being able to see the birth of Linux.

[–] duncesplayed@lemmy.one 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Now I'm imagining Linus sitting in his basement and suddenly some nerd just pops into existence behind him. "Don't mind me. I'm just going to watch over your shoulder."

[–] itty53@vlemmy.net 6 points 1 year ago (3 children)

My highschool days. Wouldn't change a thing either, except I wouldn't start smoking cigarettes.

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[–] drascus@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 year ago

It's crazy that every point in history has its own blend of "suckitude" that don't want to deal with.

30 years ago, to start creepily leaving teenage me notes to make better decisions

[–] lvxferre@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

OK... where in the world would I pop up?

If where I live, in ParanΓ‘: 1300 then. I'd be teaching the local Kaingang: a few farming techniques, a bunch of food-preserving techniques, writing and paper making. Ah, and gunpowder too, so they can use it against the Spaniards coming from AsunciΓ³n and the Portuguese from the coast. Past that I'd... marry a local girl and try to live a happy life? Language would be a struggle though, because even if I knew 2023 Kaingang or Guarani that doesn't automatically makes me know some older variety of the language.

If anywhere in the world: Republican Rome, around 150 BCE. I know basic Latin so it wouldn't be actually easier to adapt than the above. I'd probably find some craft to live from, either in a taberna selling food or blacksmithing. I actually know a few Roman recipes (thanks Apicius), I could even give them a bit of modern twist; they should already know pizza (Virgil mentions it) but a modern style pizza bianca would be new. Perhaps I should leave a note to the Julii that, if one of them conquers Gaul, he should watch out for potential killers.

[–] bane_killgrind@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You would fuck up history by preempting pizza? What kind of pizza would we end up contemporarily?

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[–] pleasestopasking@reddthat.com 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think I'd go paleolithic. Pre-agricultural, on the move finding food, being in nature. It'd be dicey obviously but like whatever, if you die you die. I feel like the physical activity, adrenaline, living in community, being in nature... Would just be nice. I feel like I probably wouldn't be depressed anymore eventually. Like who would have the time?

Also damn can you imagine seeing like 4000 lb armadillos and shit? Living among a bunch of now-extinct megafauna seems like it would be both thrilling and terrifying. Honestly I'd probably die by trying to Disney princess with a twelve foot tall deer or some shit.

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[–] olpappy@mander.xyz 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

1491 to the soon-to-be landing point of Christopher Columbus. I would bring an arsenal of modern day weaponry and then arm and train the natives in anticipation for when his ships appear on the horizon.

[–] baseless_discourse@mander.xyz 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Very excited to see what Italian people would cook without tomatoes.

[–] Stovetop@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

Still a lot of pasta, which predates the Columbian exchange. But probably a lot more focus on herbal seasonings, cheese/dairy, oils, etc. Carbonara probably still popular. A lot more pesto on average.

Pizza would be white pizza with toppings, maybe with a pesto base. Fish, meat dishes, and European vegetable dishes probably still mostly untouched.

You're really just missing tomato sauces and gnocchi with the lack of the Columbian exchange, and tomato is essentially optional in many Italian dishes anyways. Surprisingly not as big a change as I would have thought.

I think maybe in North America we associate tomatoes more strongly with Italian food because it was more readily available for Italian-American immigrants than it was back in Italy.

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

As recent as possible to have modern medicine; I like not dying from a flu...

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[–] JimmyDean@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

California in the 1960's. Being a hippy during Woodstock sounds like the ultimate experience I missed out on just because I didn't exist at the time

At least a century after the 15th Millennium but at least a century prior to the 25th Millennium.

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Lame answer but I would pick the closest time I could back to my time as I could.

I don't think I could survive without modern day technology and I really don't want to try.

If going into future is an option maybe. That would probably be my next best option if I couldn't pick a past time within the last 50 years.

[–] argv_minus_one@beehaw.org 3 points 1 year ago

The future's looking pretty bleak, so…yeah, now would be the best choice.

[–] _haha_oh_wow_@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

1 hour into the future so I can eat lunch early and avoid the dangers of going to some new reality I don't have the skills or resources to deal with.

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[–] MazeMouse@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Early 1990s. Become the stockmarket god!

[–] neshura@bookwormstory.social 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Only issue is after the firat couple wins your investments start moving the market too much making the outcome unpredictable agai

[–] King@vlemmy.net 3 points 1 year ago

Buying $10000 of Apple stock in 1997 wouldn't really move the market. TSLA, GOOG, AMZN, MSFT, NVDA, and so on. Lots of stocks where I could buy a small about and get 500x-1000x returns some 10 years later.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 1 year ago

Maybe? Some of it was already set to happen, though, and you can diversify between similar options if you're not sure whether to bet on Commodore this time.

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[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Not human prehistory. That one would suck, I'm in no way built and trained as a hunter-gatherer. Either some civilisation, pre-humans or a recent era, then.

From the wording I'm assuming limited control of where I land, So I can't airdrop in behind a world leader or into a vault, but I can choose a region.

Gilded age is tempting, for classic "change history" reasons, and because I could kickstart semiconductors early and make a buck. The disadvantage is I'd be destitute on arrival, and my education, while extensive, is undocumented there, so maybe I'd die in a coal mine anyway. Perhaps I'd pick England and try to chat up Bertrand Russel, he could vouch for my knowledge after a quick conversation and might even be a good choice to explain my situation to.

If I'm going ancient civilisation, probably Rome. I could find some sort of industry to start and even just my clothes will be valuable. The Incas would be cool to but if I'm being adventurous I want more time to prepare.

Pre-human, maybe New Zealand. I'll eat local forage and hunt moa until I eventually die. It's better than starving, and I don't have to worry so much about large predators.

[–] CalamariSafari@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not sure about pre-human NZ, I'd be worried about the Haast's Eagles wanting to turn me into a tasty snack.

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[–] Weirdbeardgame@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

Plus at least with Rome you have running sewage and democracy / a republic system somewhere in there

[–] FinallyDebunked 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Holy cow, a million years into the future!

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[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 year ago

By the way, this would be a great fit over here. https://lemmy.sdf.org/c/hypotheticalsituation if it's not indexed already.

I don't really want to miss my family for that long. Maybe I'd go back to when my kids were babies and become a live-in nannydad? I could see that getting weird though.

If I didn't have that level of control but I absolutely had to go somewhen, I guess I'd either go a few decades in the future to see how it shapes up, or to the neolithic era so I could finally find out a bunch of things we'd never otherwise have known. That era seems like it was pretty cool, and I happen to know enough baseline science to actually recreate some of my favourite amenities.

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