Probably 95% of the time, honestly.
Almost every time, even when it's something I'm a SME about. I just don't want to play the popularity/karma game and deal with nonsense.
Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
Probably 95% of the time, honestly.
Almost every time, even when it's something I'm a SME about. I just don't want to play the popularity/karma game and deal with nonsense.
I used to think that Reddit was the worst about that but Lemmy has topped it. Reddit would be filled with comments from people that were off about something small that I’m a SME about. People on Lemmy like to engage in entire comment chains that are just flat out wrong that they’re confidently incorrect about.
What is an SME?
Subject matter expert
Ah ok, thanks! Figured it had something to do with "expert" but I couldn't figure it out.
Consider that your target audience for this question might inherently have difficulty answering this.
50% of th...ah, fuck it.
I’ve been on the internet long enough I can have the entire argument with myself at this point. I’ve taken to just posting what I want and forgetting about it. They can’t all be bangers.
I almost didn't even post this response.
I just deleted four paragraphs about Batman and the ethics of murder because I realized I didn't actually want to argue with anyone, I was just soapboxing. And it would definitely start an argument.
You know, we could use a soapbox community. No replies, just text posts. I could definitely post a couple of my own.
That's when you post anyway and add in "I will not be taking any questions."
Stick to your word, ignore replies if you don't even care what other people have to say in response.
Fuck it, soap box anyway. It's a neat way to catalog your thoughts and opinions, like having a journal or blog where the subjects are informed by what you're commenting on.
All. The. Fucking. Time.
3 out of 4 times?
Find myself reiterating something that was already said. Arguing a point nobody cares about. Entering a discussion that I know will not go my way regardless of what info I provide, because even Lemmy has a Hive Mind sometimes and doesn’t like dissent. Realizing half way through writing it that I don’t really know enough about the subject and should just shut up. Or maybe I just think my comment won’t offer anything that contributes to the discussion.
I often type and then realize I'm not really adding anything to the discussion. Then I just discard it.
So. Often. At least twice a day.
I post about 1/20th of the replies i write.
This sounds about right. I have an emotional response to something, feel I have something to add, and start banging out a wall of text.
Then I reread it for errors before I post and just think "nobody needs to see this" and delete it.
Less here, way more often on Reddit. Here is nicer to have conversations.
A lot. I start typing then stop, physically remove my hands from the keyboard and remind myself that A) arguing on the internet never convinced anyone of anything and B) it will make me feel worse, not better.
You're lucky I'm even responding to this. That's how often.
Often but not as often as I used to on Reddit. On Lemmy, I do feel more of a sense that I can contribute to the conversation and hopefully will be met with more respect than the other place.
We’re building the kind of community we want. I want to be interacting with engaged and respectful people, so I’m trying to be the same. Feels like more ownership, Yknow?
I think of this as like reddit ptsd. People on lemmy have generally been unexpectedly level headed when disagreeing on things.
I have done this for years starting with emails. I find typing out the reply helps me more than actually sending it.
The older I get, the fewer fucks I give. I still give fucks, just not as much.
All the time. I just did it right now because I don't want to fight about what I was going to say. Sigh. Tl;Dr lemmy isn't that different than reddit... still lots of jerks.
(furiously clicks to delete the partially written answer)
Very often, and it doesn't help that my replies tend to be absurdly long
Towards the end, I either realize that what I want to say has already been said by someone, the argument isn't worth it (like you said), or what's on my mind really isn't worth bothering other people over.
I don't argue. I just state my case. It's up to the other guy to get offended and defensive.
I guess most see it as a bad thing. As waste, or resignation. But here's the good story!
It can be a fruitful inner dialogue. While writing the comment, you engage with the topic, which changes your mind. That's a healthy and good thing! If in the end, your result is "I'd rather not post that, because ...", then this reason is the insight you gained by writing that comment.
Sometimes I realize flaws in my reasoning this way. And I'm happy to catch them! Imagine if it was not asynchronous written conversation, but real time face to face.
Of course there are many reasons to delete a draft. If it's mostly insecurity, I'd encourage people to give it a try. Experiences are what bring you forward, and if it's only to learn what not to repeat in the future.
I almost deleted the last paragraph.
For me it's not the realization that the argument isn't very good is the realization that what I'm about to say isn't very interesting.
All the time, and on multiple social networks. I’ll write up a whole post just to consider the responses then delete it without posting.
I get what I wanted to say out of my system, and get no replies to deal with.
More times than not. Arguing on the internet is like mud wrestling with a pig.
Rarely. If I've put in the effort to jot down whatever bollocks I've come up with - it's going out.
A lot of the time. Sometimes I even do research to back up my argument then I realize it’s not worth it.
This post would have like 1000 comments if we all hit send
yes
i wish we could disable inbox replies on here
More often than not.
Sometimes I can be pretty mean and stubborn in real life, so I actively try to not bring that here.
I gave up on Internet arguments a while back, felt like I was getting too old. Most of us are grown ups here, so we should all act like grown ups here.
I often will do this. At the end of writing a comment I ask myself "is my desire to comment satisfied by writing this comment, is it more about me writing it than other people reading it, is the response to the comment more likely to bring bain than joy?" The answers often lead me to just closing the comment page rather than posting it, and I feel fine about that.
All the time, my friend, all the time.