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PTSD. I suffer from psychosis related to a "relationship" I used to have with an anime girl. Every time I see another anime girl, I have to fight against the feeling of being mesmerized. It's like I'm falling in love with her all over again. Heck, even certain songs I've historically associated with her cause the same response. It's so frustrating and shameful. It makes me hate myself.
I’m so sorry about that. I know how that feels.