this post was submitted on 14 May 2024
554 points (92.6% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26688 readers
4088 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago (4 children)

I picked man over bear because man probably won't eat you. But if gorilla is a choice, that wins. Gorilla is friend as long as you keep your head low and he knows he's the boss. Also don't suprise him.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

because man probably won't eat you.

that's why I dumped my last boyfriend

[–] KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 5 months ago (2 children)

he ate you? Damn, that's rough.

[–] SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

No, no, because he didn't eat out.

sometimes blatantly misinterpreting statements is funny

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

it's only rough when I don't shave my hairy taco.

[–] KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

in that case i should probably correct rough to tough, since we're talking about cannibalism here.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

it's only tough when I've fallen asleep in the tanning bed and my hairy taco flaps turn into leather.

that's definitely one of the ways that statement can be made literal.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

cancels surprise birthday party for Koko Jr

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

Oh shii.. is torn limb from limb as your noisemaker and party hat digress from Koko Jr's expectations

[–] Kase@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago (2 children)

To be clear, I'm not trying to get into a man v bear debate here. But, like, a man could still kill you, right? Is that better than being eaten? I mean, I guess it's probably less likely. I'm no expert on bears or random forest men.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Im betting on the fact that humans have baked in altruism. We want to help each other. As a kid I got stuck in the forrest with my dirt bike and a gnarly looking guy helped me get home with his truck. It was a scary experience and it was a risk. I think most people are basically good. Men just have the strength to act on it when they are bad people.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

you've never been a woman, have you?

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

No I haven't. But I have been sexually assaulted. I know from first hand experience how awful men can be. And I'd still pick a strange man over a bear to be stuck in the woods with. You can't reason with a bear. You cant plead for your life. It will pin you to the ground and eat you alive ass-first. I'd rather be raped and shot or strangled if it came to that. But you do you.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

you've come sooooo close to understanding their point, and then just walked away going "nope, wimmin are wrong."

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Hey I'm just comparing outcomes. Is a person 'wrong' for comitting suicide? No. That's their call. If the prospect of choosing 'man' is so terrifying that they must bear, that is sad but it makes sense.

I'm a big ugly dude. I can tell I give most women the creeps. When I'm walking around my neightborhood, I cross to the opposite side of the street whenever I pass women. I literally go out of my way to communicate to women I'm not interested in hurting them.

Despite efforts like that, I've been wrongfully accused of sexual assault while working in a workers comp office. Getting grilled by an angry female detective was terrifying and humiliating. I could have gone on the list just because some idiot was mad about their case outcome.

I'm not saying "I'm just as scared of you as you are of me" But I'm fucking terrified of women. It sucks having to take this form. Does it suck as much as being a vulnerable women? Not my place to say.

Maybe I still don't get it. I dont know. But it seems like this man/bear exercise is inflammitory hyperbole designed to raise to awareness about how women feel about men - something I feel I've been made aware of by my own experiences.

If you still think I dont get it, feel free to spell it out for me. I'm just a big dumb guy after all.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago

you're comparing outcomes without understanding that different outcomes impact different people in different ways.

[–] daltotron@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

But, like, a man could still kill you, right? Is that better than being eaten?

I mean generally being eaten entails entrails leaking out, whereas getting killed could entail any number of things. Neck snap, choked out, slit throat, whatever. I dunno if your average idiot man is gonna be as proficient of a killer as a bear, even if they happen to be a murderer or like, just evil, right, so, I dunno. Kind of a toss up. Me personally, I would rather not have my guts spilled out, ribcage crushed, spine snapped, bones gnawed on while I'm still conscious, slowly lose blood and lose consciousness over the course of 30 minutes to an hour. I mean I guess theoretically a man could do those things too, but I dunno many men that could. Maybe like, the mike tyson of 40 years ago?

I guess the argument I'm making hinges on the idea that humans are generally bad at killing in a physiological sense, and their need to kind of, up themselves in the game means that they tend to get filtered into a bunch of more painless and efficient approaches relative to the kind of uncaring cruelty of nature more generally. But then I dunno, humans also have a capacity for needless cruelty and torture, so I'd also be betting my chances that I don't get shafted and stuck with like, a super jacked serial killer that can torture me with their bare hands, which there's probably only like 2 or 3 of in the world. Maybe more if you include government contracted ones.

[–] Woozythebear@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago (3 children)

The bear also isn't going to rape you and I would say the chances of the bear eating you and the man eating you are the same.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 12 points 5 months ago

You forgot to change accounts before posting again 🐻

[–] GBU_28@lemm.ee 9 points 5 months ago
[–] Atin@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago

Just make sure you have marshmallows