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Has anyone managed to recover from а serious burnout without taking a sabbatical? How? (kbin.social)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Oteron@kbin.social to c/AskKbin@kbin.social

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I've noticed (with the help of family members and my SO) that I've become very negative, cynical and drained lately. Reading about burnout, I find all of the symptoms to be true for myself.

My job requires me to work on a single project full-time, and a couple of small side-projects. The management of the project is very chaotic and I feel more and more inadequate for my position. Priorities constantly change and just looking at the week's schedule in Monday, I can tell the we're not going meet the set goal by Friday. It has been like that for more than a year. It doesn't help that I've become very pessimistic about the main project's future.

Outside of work, I don't have much free time. The little I have, I try to spend with my loved ones. Hobbies and other interests are on the back burner.

As the title implies, I don't have the option of quitting or taking a sabbatical at the moment.

I know kbin is not a replacement for therapy but I was just wondering if anyone has been through this and found anything helpful other that distancing from their current workplace.

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[–] NotTheOnlyGamer@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

What's a "sabbatical"? I don't get paid unless I'm doing work. The way I resolve my burnout is by looking at my bank balance, average rents (and the increase of rent over the last 10 years), and my life expectancy. Until there's enough money in there that I can live on that, I have to work. And I have to assume that I'm less than 8 hours from being fired and going from my salary to minimum wage; so I'd damn well better exceed any expectations. My feelings, my ennui, and my burnout do not matter. My survival is reliant on providing greater value to my employer than I cost to keep around. My value to anyone is limited what I can provide them in the immediate past and foreseeable future - myself included.

Burnout and not being at 100% of expectations is the same as suicide. Every day I wake up and ask if today's the day. Every day so far, I've decided there's a reason to keep going. Look at it like that. If you like living, keep working.

Figure out where your inadequacy is and what is expected that's making you feel that way. Align yourself with the people who sign your paycheck - what they want should be what you want. If being around someone is making you act in a negative way, don't be around that person unless it's essential.

[–] MrAlex@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If this isn't some of the least empathetic advice I've ever read.

[–] Cableferret@lemmy.tf 4 points 1 year ago

That's right up there with my mom telling me "get a job and you won't have time or energy to be depressed" when I told her I was depressed and wanted to see a counselor as a teen.

[–] yuun@lemmy.one 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

looks more like a cry for help

[–] charcoalhibiscus@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

Yeah, that’s been my experience - that the people who are the least empathetic are the people who are having the same problem and trying the “tough love” approach on themselves to attempt to overcome it. They’ve shut off their compassion sensors because they can’t afford to apply any to themselves, so it’s not there for others either.

[–] Oteron@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

"Sabbatical" is a new concept to me as well. Where I'm from, they are unpaid.

I do subscribe to the idea that you should definitely provide a sufficient value to earn a paycheck and I do like the idea to first look inwards for the problem. I don't think what you described is a sustainable way to live though. Expectations are external and you don't have much, if any, control over them. If "not being at 100% of expectations is the same as suicide" for a long period of time, than that mindset itself is suicide. How can you always meet a 100% of something you have no control over?

Don't get me wrong, I know people's situations are vastly different and sometimes you do what you have to do at a given time to survive. But if you operate like that for a long-time, I don't think your psyche will stay intact.

Thank you for sharing!