Men's Liberation
This community is first and foremost a feminist community for men and masc people, but it is also a place to talk about men’s issues with a particular focus on intersectionality.
Rules
Everybody is welcome, but this is primarily a space for men and masc people
Non-masculine perspectives are incredibly important in making sure that the lived experiences of others are present in discussions on masculinity, but please remember that this is a space to discuss issues pertaining to men and masc individuals. Be kind, open-minded, and take care that you aren't talking over men expressing their own lived experiences.
Be productive
Be proactive in forming a productive discussion. Constructive criticism of our community is fine, but if you mainly criticize feminism or other people's efforts to solve gender issues, your post/comment will be removed.
Keep the following guidelines in mind when posting:
- Build upon the OP
- Discuss concepts rather than semantics
- No low effort comments
- No personal attacks
Assume good faith
Do not call other submitters' personal experiences into question.
No bigotry
Slurs, hate speech, and negative stereotyping towards marginalized groups will not be tolerated.
No brigading
Do not participate if you have been linked to this discussion from elsewhere. Similarly, links to elsewhere on the threadiverse must promote constructive discussion of men’s issues.
Recommended Reading
- The Will To Change: Men, Masculinity, And Love by bell hooks
- Politics of Masculinities: Men in Movements by Michael Messner
Related Communities
!feminism@beehaw.org
!askmen@lemmy.world
!mensmentalhealth@lemmy.world
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If the possibility that a man will treat a woman badly (everything between belittling and straight up murder) is high enough, it is a life insurance to expect every man to be dangerous until proven otherwise. Its the same logic as "don't talk to cops".
I've seen other men giving me answers to questions my wife asked to many times. Of course thats not dangerous, but thats still asshole-behaviour and you can recognise a whole lot of this behaviour everyday, if you just listen to your female coworkers instead of giving them the side eye. They probably wouldn't feel the need to "not-you" you, if they KNEW you are not a possible asshole.
No, it's not life insurance. It's pathological paranoia that doesn't effectively improve one's safety. If you go through life with an incredibly simplistic model of judgement, where any interaction with men or cops is dangerous until proven otherwise, you are simply trading one set of risks for another. There are many situations where a certain cop or man could be in a position to help or protect you, and you might fail to recognize that.
If you're not making any distinction between "belittling and straight up murder", then you're really just handicapping your ability to distinguish people who are actually violently dangerous from people who are just normal people. Most people act like assholes on a regular basis, but that doesn't make them dangerous.
That doesnt sound normal.
You're implying that the social environment that I was born into is dysfunctional, and also completely disregarding the substance of my comment. In other words, you're being a condescending prick. Case in point.
It's nearly impossible to be sympathetic and polite to every single person you encounter. Especially due to the state of the world today.
arent you saying that yourself?
And to the point of your other comment: It actually is dangerous to encounter to constantly encounter people that act like assholes because of your identity. This shit can be traumatic and I dont think its useful to call that not dangerous.
So, based on your own logic.
By encouraging women to treat all men as potential deviants, you encourage them to act like assholes toward men because of their identity. This traumatizes men, thus creating more misanthropes who may potentially harm other people in the future.
I don't think I was implying anything negative about you, but if I was then I apologize.
Treating all men as potentially dangerous and being an active asshole to them is not the same. You can be careful without being an asshole and tbh in most situations its actually safer to do so. You can also vent about your experiences with men in a way that doesnt create an unpleasant situation for those around you.
I also think its not as direct as you make it out. To go from mistreatment of oneself to mistreating others is a big and not necessarily logical step. I think lots of other factors are at play, many that often get summarized under the term "toxic masculinity".