this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2024
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[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (20 children)

I'm not mad. I haven't called you any childish names, or did anything else that would indicate anger. That would be you and you alone, and unless you go and start editing your posts anyone can clearly see that.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

I'm gonna be real, looking through your account, you seem like a bioessentialist. Potentially a terf, though one that hides it well.

Some of the things you've said are rooted in bioessentialism and come off as very backhanded which I'm assuming set off the other commenter's alarm bells. Quit the act or educate yourself from a trans positive feminist angle, whichever fits your role better.

for anyone that happens to read this and feels lost, here is a good place to start with what bioessentialism is and why it's linked to terfs.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Thanks, I see the article now. It must have been part of the edit, so I missed it before. I appreciate you taking the time to make the link.

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[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I have nothing against trans people, I've said nothing against trans people. I didn't know of this term "bioessentialism," but thanks to you, I've just looked it up. It does not describe my views. I am 100% aware of the concept of people being genetically one way while having a different gender. There is nothing wrong with this at all. I have never said anything remotely like that.

This other commenter is not serious. They are pretending to be trans in order to make them look bad. I don't know why they are so hateful, but at this point, there really is no other explanation. There is no reason they would be so awful to someone trying to learn.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

eat shit

edit:

I didn’t know of this term “bioessentialism,” but thanks to you, I’ve just looked it up.

yeah i sure fucking hope you did, i linked an article.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The article didn't show up. I appreciate you introducing me to a new term. The whole point of me being here is to learn.

[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

lmao "new term" right okay so you have somehow encountered the word "genetic men" and all these terf ass arguments and points, but you have never heard of a terf or of bioessentialism.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 5 months ago (6 children)

This is what I think happened. Some assholes somehow convinced you that anyone who isn't already super knowledgeable about this stuff has to be evil with deep secret motives. Now, when anyone asks questions or doesn't know certain things, you immediately go into psycho vicious attack mode. This only serves to benefit the asshole. It makes you come across as an absolute asshole who hates anyone who tries to learn. They tricked you. If you want to beat them, then just be kind and quit assuming everyone is out to get you.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

It's pattern recognition as a survival strategy.

You're talking to someone part of a vulnerable and marginalized minority group, they're going to be on edge because of so many people that treat us like shit or literally want us dead.

Wanna know how to make sure trans people don't attack you when you (assuming in good faith) "just ask questions?" Don't be argumentative when they tell you something contrary to your preexisting beliefs.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I'm sorry that people have been so very bad to them. I know it sucks. I can't imagine what it is like. I can't relate to what someone must have gone through to make them so angry about questions and common expressions. It must be awful. I feel like it would require an absolute expert to be able to navigate this minefield of potential triggers, and I highly doubt that the average person will be able to do it any time soon, if ever. This isn't just "be kind" and everything will be alright. This is "if you don't have memorized a whole bunch of stuff or if you are new to it, then you will be shouted down and called a bunch of names and told what a bigot you are".

Nobody can be expected to immediately be at that point. This is a perfect recipe for a self-fulfilling prophecy of misunderstandings and ongoing hate. The people who are winning from all this are the people who want there to be needless fights. It's not my place to speak to how traumatized people should behave, so I won't do that. All I can say is that most people I know would much rather avoid conversations that have such a high chance of being so accidentally aggressive and as a result this wall isn't going to come down any time soon.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

just gonna repeat this because it seems like you didn't see it

Wanna know how to make sure trans people don’t attack you when you (assuming in good faith) “just ask questions?” Don’t be argumentative when they tell you something contrary to your preexisting beliefs.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 5 months ago (8 children)

Being unable to contradict, or debate, or dig deeper is no way to deal with an equal human. That is awkward, and unnatural, it is walking on egg shells. Can it really be that there is an entire group of people that don't want to be seen as equals and want everyone to always treat them with kid gloves? I highly, highly doubt it. The vast majority of them must want to just be seen as normal, equal peers. The solution can't be to simply right off a whole group of people as the ones that you can't be relaxed and comfortable around and just speak your mind.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone -1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

I have no idea how you got any of that from what I said.

Disagree silently if you must disagree, but don't be argumentative.

Our existence and rights are not up for debate.

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I would never dream of arguing that you don't deserve to exist or have rights.

This discussion largely started because a good friend of mine, a 17 year old girl, was told that she would have to wrestle against someone who was identifying as a girl. This person was born a male, they went through male puberty, they never took any hormone blockers, they were absolutely going to crush her. A year prior to the fight, this person would have beat you up if you called them a girl. They were in a straight relationship with a girl. I'm sorry, but I won't say it is fair for my friend to have to wrestle them. I won't. It is terribly unfair. This is what I mean when I say that it is OK for me to have differing views.

[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'll take "things that never happened" for 500

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It did happen, and it isnt like it is an isolated event.

This is very different from your response the last time I mentioned it(unless I have you mistaken with someone else). I thought before you said that the other wrestler had just as much right to fight as she did and "what about the future of the trans wrestler". My apologies if that wasn't you.

[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

oh I thought everyone who disagrees with you is the same person???

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Oh my. I don't know what to say.. you're an anomaly to me, truly a fascinating individual.

[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world -1 points 5 months ago
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[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

cool! want to avoid these conversations? stop talking about trans people!!!

[–] Feddyteddy@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 5 months ago (3 children)

I refuse to abandon a whole group of people. I want a world where all types of people can live in harmony and peace and can all benefit from our incredible variety as a species.

I know this is exhausting and time-consuming, but I have learned so much from this, and I don't regret a fraction of a second of it. The most I can do is hope that eventually you look back on our discussion someday in a positive light, even if right now it doesn't seem possible.

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[–] whoreticulture@lemmy.world 0 points 5 months ago

I think they're hiding it quite poorly lmao

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