Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
I used to be just like you, I worked for a small startup, I was in essence their only programmer. I considered the owners my friends. Then one day I got sick and send a message saying I wasn't going to be able to go on that day, one of the owners came in that day and asked for me (just because he found it weird that I wasn't there) and another one of the owners threw a tantrum at me over email saying I couldn't just decide not to go, that I either took a dr note or the day would be discounted from my pay. That did it for me, in that moment I realised that the weekends and extra hours I had given them were worthless, I went back a few days later with the Dr note and my resignation. On my next job I vowed to myself that I wouldn't take work home, they forced clock in and clock out times, so the moment I clocked out I forgot everything about the work, and if ever I started to think about it I would remind myself that they don't care.
I work for a much better company now, and as a general rule as soon as the work is done I'm done with work, there are exceptions when things need to happen before a certain date, but I also get TOIL or something in exchange.
If the owners were your friends they would have recognized how pivotal you were and given you significant equity. I'm sure you already know, but it is possible to be friends with the owners of the company you work for, but friends value each other and wouldn't let their friends work that hard without making sure they're properly compensated with stock, so proper reward and friendship go hand in hand, and friendship is not a replacement for compensation no matter how good of friends you are.