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Hot and Cold (lemmy.ml)

submitted 9 months ago by electric_nan@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

17 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Does anyone else vacillate between feeling hot (attractive) and repellant?

Some days I feel like all the women around me find me desirable, and other days I feel like none of them do. I rarely feel 'in between'.

I don't really like feeling either extreme. For one thing, I don't trust either feeling! Feeling unattractive is obviously a bad feeling, but feeling ultra attractive is also bad. It leads me to uncomfortable fantasies and an inability to distinguish normal interactions from flirtation.

Does anyone else feel like this?

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[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 1 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I've never been ogled, but still I can imagine it loses any novelty pretty quickly.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It does. But also relationships do when you're almost 50.

[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm 45 and have been married to the same woman for over 20 years. I love her very much but I also can't help but wonder sometimes what dating would be like now.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I can't imagine! I've been married 26 years and I've never even online dated. I don't think I'm cut out for it. It seems unreal. My friend has tons of success on those sites and says for every women there are like 50 men clamoring for her attention. But I'm really not that into love anymore myself.

[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 2 points 8 months ago

That's funny. I have had male friends get divorced in their 30s and 40s say that they are hot commodities among women their own age. They never date for long before ending up in another LTR though.