this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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As the title states really. I need to refer to this diverse group of people, who somehow have gotten put in the same box labeled "sexual minorites".

I'm a boring CISHET vanilla white male, so I don't really know. I want to include as many as I can when I refer to "lgbtq+ people". I've been studying various flags, trying to find the one flag I need. But I can't really figure it out.

Is lgbtq+ the preferred term, or what should I use? Is a flag better? I don't want to hurt someone by not including them.

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[–] z00s@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Can I respectfully ask, what's the definition of queer as opposed to lesbian, gay, bi, trans or intersex? As in, why is it included in the acronym? Does it have a specific meaning that isn't covered by the other terms?

[–] aphlamingphoenix@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I use the term "queer" to describe myself because my sexual identity (which is something like bisexual or pansexual) and my neurodivergence have made me something of a cultural outcast throughout most of my life. I don't really "fit in" with most people, and "queer" describes that experience pretty succinctly.

To the person you are responding to, I am cautious about using this word too broadly because some people have specific trauma around this word. Bigots often wield the word like a weapon, so people who are subjected to that and don't have adequate supports to deal with that trauma can get offended by it. I don't think we should so flippantly dismiss that. It works for me. It doesn't work for others.

[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world 0 points 8 months ago

I think there's something to be said for not self-censoring due to the potential of someone's personal trauma. Respectfully, some random person's issues are not my problem and should not affect my ability to identify myself or others, as long as I'm not doing so in a mean spirited way. If words cause you mental issues, you should work on that with a therapist. I will not coddle you.

[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago (1 children)

"Queer" is a catchall term. It specifically does not have a specific meaning. It's meant for people who do not fit into the cishet idea of gender, but also don't fall neatly into the L, G, or B of LGBT.

"Queer" technically encompasses the L, G, and B too. Anything outside of cishet "norm". A fully straight metrosexual could consider himself queer.

[–] kent_eh@lemmy.ca 1 points 8 months ago

Plus its one of the letters in the growing acronym.