this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2024
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[–] PeepinGoodArgs@reddthat.com 46 points 9 months ago (4 children)

The maximal use case! That's a good way of thinking about it!

I'm struggling with my SO to buy a reasonable house in a high cost of living area. They want a massive 2000 Sq ft monstrosity because we plan to have a kid soon, and I'm thinking 1500 is more than enough. They're reasoning it's we need space for each other and entertaining. My reasoning is I want to eat out at the nearby fantastic restaurants nearby more often and buy cheese and wine and stuff.

[–] zeekaran@sopuli.xyz 32 points 9 months ago (2 children)

The more walkable the location of the house, the less space you need because that space is outside your house.

[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 19 points 9 months ago (2 children)

US cities are rapidly running out of 3rd places. There's almost no neighborhood commercial centers with a cafe and a pub/bar that you can visit for extended periods of time.

The net result is that the home and the workplace are the primary locations we can spend time in.

[–] GhostFence@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

Running out of 3rd spaces? LOL you only see those in museums now. See the smilodon exhibit next to the woolly mammoth exhibit and next to that is the American 3rd Space exhibit!

[–] XTL@sopuli.xyz 2 points 9 months ago (3 children)

That somehow sounds like the primary space people spend time in should be a bar and not their home. That's insane. Though maybe it's some kind of an extrovert dream.

[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 7 points 9 months ago

That's quite the straw man of my statement. You've read a ton into what I wrote.

Given that, I get to turn right around and say "okay, then we'll have no absolutely no places outside of work and home. All supplies delivered to a drop box on your doorstep so introverts never have to talk to a human."

My point was that communities historically have had places where people can choose to go and spend time in the shared space. Common examples of these spaces include cafes and bars/pubs. Geez you made me have to be stupid pedantic.

I enjoy going to shared public spaces and businesses that welcome sitting and relaxing. So sue me. I also make friends with every housecat, dog, hamster, and houseplant (if no pets are available) at parties I get roped into. I am, at best, a light duty introvert.

I spend way too much time in my house because going out to places in the US is extra work. The accessibility of places to sit and relax around my neighbors is next to nil. This isn't true when I get to visit international cities that aren't capitalist car-centric hellscapes. There, I walk to nearby places to sit and enjoy my city, not just my apartment. The world should have places to be outside the home, even if hiding in your four walls is both an introverts dream and a capitalism goal.

[–] GhostFence@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

Meanwhile COVID loves extroverts!

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

No, they're just saying it would be a part of that space. Like with a veterans club. You don't have to buy anything to be there. (Of course you do need to pay your membership, which is why we're talking about spaces that are just funded as a government item)

[–] MudMan@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I mean... it depends on what you mean, I guess? Even if I hadn't spent the pandemic lockdowns comfortably holed up in a small apartment, it's worth noting that big-ass houses typically have yards while small apartments do not.

I guess if you mean "having shops, bars and restaurants within walking distance" that can maybe work, but otherwise that doesn't seem to track.

[–] zeekaran@sopuli.xyz 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Ah yes the private yard, another anti third space.

Public parks. The city even does your landscaping for you.

[–] MudMan@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago

I don't really know what this conversation was meant to be about at this point, and after re-reading the thread in order a few times I think you don't either.

[–] MudMan@kbin.social 16 points 9 months ago (65 children)

I had to use a unit converter, but I've lived in places housing up to seven people that weren't that big. Comfortably.

This is a conversation I had here recently as well when I pointed out to a car thread that for the money Americans pay for pickup trucks you can also buy a hatchback and a proper van, cover most use cases and not drive a tank to take kids to school. They did NOT like that.

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[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Ok. We raised 4 kids in an 1800 sq foot house with one bathroom. I do not recommend the one bathroom, but the space was more than adequate.

Having said that, it does make a difference, we have the same size house now and only 2 kids left at home, but this house has a bigger main kitchen/dining area, smaller bedrooms, a separate living room for the kids, an enormous back porch/deck adding to the useable space and entertaining space is really helpful more than I had imagined.

1500 arranged right with small bedrooms and enough common area, and at least 2 bathrooms sure. It's not a small house, that's a medium size house. With an enormous porch? Hell yeah. We used to live in one of those with two other couples, it was fine. But I do think you are undercounting the value of common space.

[–] IMALlama@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

We have two kids in a 3 bed/2 bath 1350 sq ft home. We do have a full basement, but the kids aren't really allowed down there (power tools, toy stash, etc). I guess I do hang out there some nights, but that's only because my gaming computer moved downstairs years ago when our oldest started to be able to reach the keyboard and pull key caps off it.

In our experience, you're probably not going to do a lot of entertaining while you have young kids. While one of your kids is under 3-4, and sometimes older, they're going to need naps. They're also going to have early bedtimes. Naps are mostly behind us, and we do have afternoon play dates, but the kids don't really care what space they're in as long as they're engaged and have things to do. Having an adult gathering is... very rare. We have a nice sized yard, so we tend to have gatherings outside.

I don't think we need extra bedrooms or bigger bedrooms/bathrooms. An office might be nice, but working from the basement works just as well. A toy room could be nice, but to me it would be wasted space as the kids get older and have fewer, but larger/more engaging, toys. At least around here, the extra room comes with extra walls that result in a space that's not often used (think a formal dining room).

There's also the financial side of things. We could afford a larger house, but would rather be putting any extra into 529s, our own 401ks, etc. Kid related expenses really add up before you start also thinking about a bigger mortgage payment.