this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2024
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Interesting. I didn't know this. Personally, I actively avoid sex. No interest.
Yep. Asexuality and aromanticism define a lack of a type of attraction. There are a lot of different ways to group attraction types but here is one of the most common ones.
Libido is entirely seperate and in many cases is only somewhat related. Of course, there are plenty of ace people like you too. But personally all of the ace people I know are the horniest people in my friend group. Not finding anyone sexually attractive doesn't stop a person from being a theoretical slut.
Honest question, if you are ace but also very horny, what are you horny about..? What makes you horny? This seems a bit contradictory to me.
I’m not ace, and I feel horny about things I’m sexually attracted to. I can’t imagine feeling horny for other things?
The gist of it is that it's the act not the person. Not feeling sexual attraction basically just means that thwre is noone I find "hot". There are still people I like for platonic reasons and I can still appreciate asthetic beauty but I never look at a person and find them sexually apealing. That doesn't mean they're unapealing it's just that I lack that specific feeling. It's like describing the taste of light; it just doesn't make sense to me.
Even if there is noone I find sexually attractive the act of sex still appeals to me just because it is fun and feels good. When it comes to potential sexual partners platonic attraction is typically what I base that on. It just a fun activity between friends like playing a board game or watching a movie. You can still constantly desire sex without feeling sexual attraction, thus horny.
You could just be horny for your own pleasure, and not towards your sexual partner.
Huuummm but then I feel the word horny has different meanings for us. I’m not horny for pleasure, I’d say. I’m horny for things I’m sexually attracted to. And I feel pleasure in indulging in that. The horniness is not for the pleasure, it’s a feeling that represents that sexual attraction.
How would you describe being “horny for your own pleasure”?
I hope I’m not coming off like a dick, I’m just genuinely curious I swear 😆
Well, I'm not asexual, so I can't really answer for them. But there are times where I am more turned on by the feeling of pleasure than by the subject I am faced with, in a sense. I would assume that is how it works for asexual people.
*Not ace. Getting horny for me feels like a reptile brain thing intruding in my normal life. It's like my body has a very limited use superpower, and can randomly provide hornyness at specific and un-specific moments :) I responded to you because 'just getting horny' seems weird to you, while it doesn't to me.