Transfem

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A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
Please be kind and respectful to all.
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Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.

To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]

Some helpful links:

The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.

Support Hotlines:

The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.

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LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone

ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone

how did you deal with internalised transphobia? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 11 months ago by Vlaxtocia@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone

9 comments fedilink hide all child comments

It's something I'm really struggling with, thanks to it it feels like I'm obsessed with the idea of 'passing', like whenever I see other trans women who don't pass it gives me a little burst of dread, thinking that it's impossible to pass and I'd never be able to. That horrible fear of looking "like a man in a dress" like there's actually a problem with that outside of the societal expectation I've had slotted into my brain.

I know that you don't have to pass to be trans, and that all trans women are equally valid, and that what I really need to do is to let go of the idea of passing altogether, and just be happy being who I am on the inside.

I was just wondering if any of you girls have been through something similar, and if you had any advice. Xx

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[–] LegionEris@feddit.nl 4 points 11 months ago

Random trans folk I see look right past me.

I had this happen with a whole group of trans women staying at the motel I used to work at. I passed to them to the point that there was no "oh hey!" moment, no Charlie Kelly meerkat eyes. It was a strange experience, at once sad and satisfied?

Now I work at a dispensary and smoke or vape weed every day. For better or worse, I'll never voice pass consistently in a world with legal weed. Which I guess is fine. I'm not especially fond of the "oh whoa" moment on the faces of straight men who have decided from a distance I was a hotgirl(tm) and they were gonna treat me a certain way, but I guess I'd rather disarm straight people than be invisible to young trans girls.