this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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Asklemmy

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Please don't ask why I need this.

It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.

It has to be something I can easily find.

EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:

  • I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.

  • I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.

  • I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.

  • I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).

  • Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.

  • If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.

Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.

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[โ€“] cly@lemmy.world 166 points 1 year ago (5 children)

In 10 years, people are going to say "I joined Lemmy before the 3 days without pooping post"

[โ€“] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 28 points 1 year ago (4 children)

This could be our Jolly Rancher

[โ€“] InEnduringGrowStrong@lemm.ee 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

After the self induced constipation, they'll need the poop knife for sure.

[โ€“] Canic@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 year ago

Either that, or it'll turn into a poop sword

I just hope OP doesn't break both arms while they're out doing... whatever it is they're going to be doing.

[โ€“] Kyle@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Please refresh me on the jolly rancher story.

No. Trust me, it's in your best interests.

If you google it you will find it, but you've been warned

[โ€“] sysadmin420@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Waves hand, our three envelopes.

[โ€“] TheShane@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

I know I will. Now...

[โ€“] BOB_DROP_TABLES@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

This sounds like the beginning of great tifu post

[โ€“] artaban@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

there is no way this will be happen