this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2023
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Now, this isn't a "gotcha" or intended to be snarky, I really am curious: Would you date another non-passing trans lesbian?
I'm not really sure. It'd depend on their personality and such since I have no sexual attraction to penis which means sex is a no. Which is the same issue that a cis lesbian is going to have and I am understanding of that. Other elements impact it that have nothing to do with a person trans status or lack of.
I'm not saying all cis lesbians are out there shitting on trans women. It's honestly likely a minority. But they are going to seek out a partner that matches their personal criteria and I'm understanding of that.
@IvyRaven @Kolanaki
I have no idea how far you are on the transition and how far you want to/can go. But if you feel inadequate, know that there are plenty of sapphic women out there that won't mind your passing.
If you truly have a hard time, maybe the bisexual community will be more welcoming for you? Not that they will see you as a man, but that they are used to be attracted to more masculine features, no need to be perfect passing (as if that existed) to get our interest.
Appreciate that. I should try to get back out there but it's a hurdle I can't get past. My transition has stalled out due to a bunch of physical and mental health issues. And as a jobless shut in it's basically impossible to address those issues where I live. I've got a lot of good qualities but yeah the bad feel like no one could deal with. But that's just my opinion.
Can't give particularly relevant insight, as a cis-seeming biromantic who was asexual until recently, but in my experience, people aren't nearly as rigid in their sexuality, romanticity or gender as society would have us believe. It seems many use specific terms as shorthand descriptors for themselves, but are surprisingly open to broader ways of being.
Verging on elderly now, so lived through the time when very little of this was stuff most of us could name, still less go into detail about, and I don't mean to suggest that it is anything but hard for anyone who falls outside the bellcurve(s), but there will be people out there for you whom you also find attractive.
Wishing you all the best with your health, and with your return to your transition. Hold on to that sense that you have a lot of good qualities.