this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2023
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Pretty much the title - I met a girl on Hinge, we decided to go grab a drink, then one thing left to another and we ended up sleeping together.

Now, the girl mentioned that she would have to see the doc if I went down on her. But I was drunk and didn't pay much attention.

When I mentioned it was also something she wanted, she agreed to take half, but also, that I have to pay her cab expenses home.

Would you or would you not feel like this person is an escort? It feels so strange being asked to pay after having sex. Or am i the only one?

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[โ€“] MrBubbles96@lemmy.ml 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Paying for the sex? If she isn't an escort or if money wasn't discussed at all, she's not getting paid jack.

Paying for the taxi ride home is another story and is probably not gonna break the bank.

[โ€“] AttackBunny@kbin.social 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm genuinely curious, and I'm not trying to start an argument, but why do you think that OP should pay for the cab ride home? I'm going to assume the woman was not an escort, that she went to OP's place of her own accord, and was a willing participant. So my questions is why is it seen as the "right thing to do" to give her money to get home?

I ask this as a woman, who would never assume that I didn't need to figure my own shit out, after a night of partying, because it's my responsibility. I get it is probably the nice thing to do, maybe, but even then, she theoretically had fun too.

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[โ€“] MrBubbles96@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Oh, no, I didn't mean it as it's something that has to be done, tho rereading my comment i can see where that's implied, I meant it more as:

Paying for the cab fare does not suddenly make the person you slept with a prostitute (that's what i got from OP's comment. That as soon as money was added into the equation, he's suddenly with an escort), hence "that's another story".

It isn't a must on your part to cough up cash for the other person at all, but I dunno, I feel like the least you can do is offer to pitch in if it's not gonna inconvenience you and she's not being rude about shit (in this case, it's hard to tell for me if she was); but that's a me thing. When you're raised to offer your help when you can and you lived in the not-so-nice parts of town most of your life...yeah, I tend to ask anyone that's with me if they can make it home alright and offer to help somehow if I'm able to. I understand if people can't or don't wanna do the same, tho admittedly, I sometimes forget that it's not like, the standard response, you get me?

[โ€“] AttackBunny@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago

Fair. Thank you for the answer.

[โ€“] dystop@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

As a dude I would offer to pay for their cab home, but someone asking for that is a yellow flag.

Asking for me to pay for a bunch of stuff, including the cab, would be a red flag. Unless I've travelled back in time to the 70's or I'm living in Saudi Arabia, paying for my date should be a nice thing to do, not an expectation.