this post was submitted on 09 Jan 2025
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Installing a bidet was one of the best decisions I've made in the bathroom, but it makes pooping at work a lot worse.
Only using TP now makes me feel like cave man. If you got poop on your hand, would you just wipe it off with napkin and go on about your day? No.
To be fair, I don't go around touching things and eating with my bare buttcrack all day. I do those things with my hands, which I wash after going to the bathroom. And I shower at least once a day and clean that buttcrack with soap.
That's not to say that a bidet isn't better than TP, just that the analogy never made sense.
You're still carrying it around with you. Forget about it being on your hands - if you got some shit on your leg, would you wipe it off with a paper towel and call it a day? You're not touching things and eating with your shins after all
If that's all that were available, and if repurposing existing fixtures to jury-rig something would be awkward and violate social norms, and if the leg-shit were always someplace where the contours of the human body kept it from really touching anything else, and if my culture had a practice of including an extra layer of relatively expendable clothing that was always between the leg-shit-spot and my pants, then yeah, I'd manage.
It's not that it's a terrible analogy, but it's more a bit from standup routine than a revelation about life. That being said, I'd still very much prefer to be able to wash it off with water, and while my shins are generally fine, I try to avoid pooping outside the house and will not be giving up my home bidets, thank you very much.
It's not supposed to be a "revelation about life" though??And I wasn't talking about taking a shit in public, I just said getting shit on your leg.
If you're walking barefoot in a park and step on some dog shit, I doubt you'll feel clean after wiping it out from between your toes with a dry paper towel. Even (especially?) if you put shoes on after
I feel like this thread has a bunch of Charmin employees commenting.
Yes the debate was a bit weird
The anti-bidet brigade was out in full force with the weirdest arguments I've ever seen lol
i wash my butt and legs with soap every time i poop
So you're saying you have soap with your bidet? I don't typically see soap as part of usual attachments.
What? Where did I mention soap in either scenario?
Explicitly? Nowhere, but then again you offered no alternative, just made the comparison of using TP on your butthole with using a paper towel on your leg.
Nevermind that we don't typically pressure wash our legs when we get things on them, poop or otherwise, the inference seems to be that we should want to wash the area. Which typically uses soap.
Now, if you want to actually finish your analogy so it fully explains differences and have a full discussion about it, feel free. I'm sure plenty of people will have fun poking more holes in it, though, so I hope you don't get too up in arms about it.
Nah man, I'm good on the analogy since you seem pretty heated about it lol
I'll just accept that you think rinsing something off with water is somehow less clean than wiping it off with a dry paper towel.
No, but I eat with my hands. My butt hole hardly ever touches my food before I've eaten it.
It's rare, but it still occurs.
Not ruling it out.
You know that cucumber in the salad that you just ate...
I just read your comment as, "I eat butt with my hands."
You don't wash your hands after shitting?
That's not what I said at all.
You said you just wipe it off with a napkin and go about your day.
Sounds like you're not using soap and warm water to wash your hands for at least thirty seconds after every poop.
Omg I came here to comment exactly this. Such a luxury
You know, you could bring a water bottle to the bathroom and one of these pocket sized bidet caps and nobody would really know. Unless you chose a crinkly bottle I guess
That is a phenomenal tip right there!! Didn't know these products existed, thanks a ton.
Um... my dude... I'm going to need a lot more water pressure than that...
That being said, I wonder if you could make an adapter for a battery powered paint sprayer... or just give zero fucks and leave a pressure washer in the stall. Obviously not full power, but pressure wouldn't be an issue then.
If you have the accessibility to leave a functioning pressure washer in the stall... you could just get a bidet installed.
20 years ago I worked with a woman with a special water bottle. Everybody knew.
Well I hope she owned it, though if pre-covid probably not. Sentiment has shifted a little since the great tp shortage.
If I was her today I’d fuckin own it. Already use those portable ones to shit in the woods.
Toilets without bidet..? How do people clean their ass? In the shower? They go around with stank ass all day
Umm... we use a little modern miracle called the Three Seashells.
I have a bidet but can only use it in the summer because the water is ice in the winter :(. I'd love to hook up the hot water to it but there's no way to do it in my rented house
Extension cord and it’ll use electric heating.
Searching for "self heating bidet attachment" will give you an array of options from $45 to $300
A lot of Japanese bidets have a water AND seat heating feature, no need for hot water hookup. I know it seems expensive but it's very well-made and I'm very happy with mine.
https://a.co/d/e0QTxAN