this post was submitted on 18 Dec 2024
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BILF
Billion-year-old
I'd
Like to
Fuck
Trust me bro. Humanity is collectively fucking the earth everyday. Some way more than others tho
I don't know man. That's quite the age gap.
But that thigh gap is the size of the Mid-Atlantic Ridge
That should replace “throwing a hotdog down a hallway” as a euphemism.
My favourite came from an episode of MadTV from the late 90s
A woman has given birth and her husband is so sexually frustrated that he just wants to get back to having sex with this wife again ... the wife pushes him off and says "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ... I'm not ready yet! ... it would be like throwing a pencil down a mineshaft!"
You really shouldn't be that thirsty for salt water.
That deep water Hydrothermal vent tho
When her hot folds boil your foreskin off... 😩
"Baby .... I just want to spread open your tectonic plates and watch your magma flow"