Ask Lemmy
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Personally, I desperately want more normal people on lemmy. There's a disproportionate number of truly toxic people on here who love preaching about their particular fixation, usually political, usually far leftist (compared to the world at large). If I see a discussion about the best car to buy, I don't want it dominated by a bunch of "cars suck!!" comments. If someone asks a question about an issue with Windows, I don't need to see nothing but Linux evangelism. All of those viewpoints are fine, but in moderation and without vitriol.
I definitely want communities of people like that. When I buy a new laptop, I'll probably put Linux on it and I'd love some advice. Sometimes I like having brainstorming sessions about the best way to promote public transit. I often enjoy arguing politics. But not everything has to be a crusade.
And for the love of Christ, I want more NSFW topics. Dating, sex, porn.
What do you mean by normal? The lemmyNSFW instance has plenty of smut, especially if you are a guy you will probably enjoy it. Not as much discussion though, I agree with you on that, I too like the talk about sex and it's not fast moving, no.
If you just mean reasonable people, I have been lucky I guess. Haven't run into too many crazy in any direction.
I think the early adopters of online forums are always going to be sort of geeky, otherwise we wouldn't find or enjoy them. I remember the early Usenet text forums, was on a belly dancing group and like 75% of us were in tech as day jobs. Reddit wasn't always like it is now, either. Probably even Facebook started with the more geeky crowd. I am sort of an outlier in this way, older and I guess a "normie" by most definitions but not tolerant of most social media so do jump earlier.
The !cocktails@lemmy.world is my baby here and slow and steady growth is more manageable, I have had close to zero need to moderate it at all, it has been great. So maybe follow more lifestyle stuff like that, if you want less tech focused discussion.
It all depends on your definition of normie I think. Growth for the sake of growth, no, but we are not quite at the critical mass that keeps it moving fast.
Almost all sex topics are on the LemmyNSFW instance. Your account should be able to "see" those. There won't be dating though, because I suppose the admins do not want to be seen as liable when a date goes horribly wrong or so.
It's tiny though compared to lemmy, so it doesn't pop up organically (heh) on my feed.
In size, I think they are in the top 6 overall, and top 3 for any non-general Lemmy instance.
I like people who think critically themselves (and are sometimes weird in lovely ways). Often I find them to be leftists and/or Linux users. I encourage your independent thought as to why.
NSFW is anglospeak for "idiots' sandbox". but it doesn't work because it doesn't control the quality of contributors. just wastes bandwidth making immatures and bad communicators feel at home.
I wanna play in the idiot sandbox and make idiot sandcastles😭