this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2022
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Interesting story the other day, a male and female friend did something independently that I found cute. I didn't tell either of them that it's cute. For the male - didn't want to offend him by saying X was cute. For the female, didn't want her to think I'm hitting on her.
A few years ago I offended a male friend by saying something along those lines.
Honestly, feel slightly bad to have to check my speech and I def didn't check myself with the ex. I could try talking with these friends about this but uhh I don't know how to bring it up, specifically around the male.
I typically ask people what words to use or avoid with them when complimenting and follow it up with "such as cute or handsome" because it tends to get the point across when it comes to gendered language. People have hangups for many valid reasons and I want people to receive language in the way they desire.