this post was submitted on 24 Aug 2023
405 points (95.5% liked)

Memes

45643 readers
1119 users here now

Rules:

  1. Be civil and nice.
  2. Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 26 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] cheer@lemm.ee 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

...then Mario stopped running to the right, and turned to stare closely, directly at the screen. And I mean really close. As Mario's face became bigger, his eyes were black with red pupils, and he was crying blood! But this blood was more realistic than any blood you'd be able to see on a TV screen; it looked like hyper-realistic blood was coming out of Mario's eyes!!1!

I'll never forget that weird Mario cartridge that strange old man gave me at that garage sale... Who knows where it is now.

[–] halvar@lemm.ee 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

How did you make it so... Creepypasta-like?

[–] WiildFiire@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

Because that's 80% of creepypastas

[–] cheer@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago

I just used what I remember from Sonic.exe and Ben Drowned lol

[–] TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago

must be hard being 12

[–] Gutless2615@ttrpg.network 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

My kingdom for an actually creepy creepy pasta and not Bigfoot fan fiction erotica

[–] rmuk@feddit.uk 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not a creepypasta per sé but some of the SCP stuff is good.

[–] Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 year ago

Reading the SCP wiki is what drastically improved my English. I was reading and listening to people reading those articles and stories almost daily. It made me jump from being decent but still not that proficient to being able to write essays and sustain long discussions relatively well.

The articles being short and mostly self contained made it significantly more easier to stay hooked and far less suseptible to feel bored compared to reading a book.

[–] Adramis@beehaw.org 2 points 1 year ago
[–] joelfromaus@aussie.zone 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Uncle Benny said that to me once when I was 8 and he was babysitting me.

[–] HomerAtTheBat@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] anoxydre@jlai.lu 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You’re the one depicted here. You should share it

[–] HomerAtTheBat@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

SUNDAY, three days for the match

Fabio Coentrao is in a tank top in his living room, laying on the couch, watching a repeat of 'The Simpsons' while rolling a cigarette. His phone rings. Ha places the cigarrette on his ear and pick up the phone with some reluctance.

Coentrao: [dry cough] Yes? Ancelotti: Fabio? How are you. I am the manager. I think we need you for the next week. Marcelo is suspended. Coentrao: [Covers the handset with one hand and whispers a pair of swear words in Portuguese. Breathes deeply. Checks his agenda. Gets back on the phone more calmed] When will it be? Thursday I can't. Poker game with the lads. Ancelotti: No. There's no Champions on Thursday. On Wednesday. Against Atleti. Coentrao: In Bilbao? Ancelotti: No, Fabio. Against last year's team. The ones from Lisbon. Coentrao: [Writes down the date in an empty box of pizza] OK, mister. On Wednesday, I'll be there. Call me a cab, I'm still without my driving license. Do I need to go to Valdebebas these days? Ancelotti: Mmmm. It wont be necessary. As long as you're ready for Wednesday it'll be fine. I count on you, eh. By the way, Benzema is injured. Chicharito will play. Coentrao: Who? Ancelotti: Chicharito. The Mexican who came this summer. The one who has been training with us since October? Well, nevermind. I'll introduce you on Wednesday. Don't forget to bring a white shirt. Coentrao: Ok, boss.

Coentrao hangs up and sighs. There is smoke in the room. He starts lookinf for his boots through piles of clothes, dolls made ​​with cans of beer and Chinese food leftovers. He doesn't remember where he put them the last time. He doesn't even remember his last game. Smells the white shirt. Ugh.

MONDAY, two days before the match

The phone rings again. 12:36 in the morning. Fabio's hand emerge from the sheets trying to reach the nightstand. Who will call such an ungodly hour? There must be an emergency.

Ronaldo: Fabio, I'm Cris. How you doing monster. Did I wake you up? Coentrao: [With sleepy voice but pretending to be awake] Hey, Cris. Nothing nothing. Nah, don't worry. I was doing some pushups. Ronaldo: Hey, as the mister said, we need you strong for Wednesday. Like the old times. Coentrao: Yes, yes. Claro. Count on it. He also told me that we play with a Colombian. Chapulín or something like that. [Awkward silence] Ronaldo: This ... yes. That's him. Get fit, man. We are all counting on you. Coentrao: Tranqui, tron.

TUESDAY, one day before the match

Fabio goes to the park in front of his house to jog a little. He wears some New Balance sneakers he used to play tennis in 98 and a shirt with "What happens in Cascais stays in Cascais." written on it. After doing some stretching, runs 10 minutes and starts coughing. Well, enough for today, he thinks while he checks his heart rate. Subjecting the body to great efforts before the game could be damaging. So unprofessional.

Turns on the TV and Barça is playing against PSG. Didn't they play this year already? Thinks a confused Fabio. He laughs every time the camera focuses on David Luiz's hair.

WEDNESDAY, gameday

Fabio gets to the stadium by taxi. He doesn't remember very well where's the entrance to the locker room. A nice gentleman named Chendo accompanies him to his locker. He dresses. He senses the tense atmosphere in the locker room. They will play with Sergio Ramos in the midfield, which sounds strange. But Fabio never asks questions. He just follows orders. There's a guy by his side with the #14 praying on his knees. Xabi Alonso looks different. Maybe he shaved.

He steps onto the pitch and right as the Champions League anthem starts, Fabio turns. He fights every ball. He leaves it all on the pitch. Spectacular. After 87 minutes, the praying guy scores. He seems excited. Public chants a strange name. Spanish is a weird language, Fabio thinks while he crashes with Raúl García after a split ball.

Minute 90. Subbed off. The public recognizes his effort.

He showers and Ancelotti congratulates him.

Ancelotti: Huge game, Fabio. Coentrao: Thank you, mister. It's not important. Here I am for what you need. Call me for the second leg.

Ancelotti is puzzled but prefers to say nothing. Coentrao leaves the Bernabeu without saying goodbye to anyone or talking to the press, lights a Lucky Strike and tries to stop a taxi.

Ancelotti shakes his head and smiles. Opens a pack of gum, arching an eyebrow, and starts chewing while he mumbles: "There's a method to his madness."

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

...I'm not sure you know what a creepypasta is.. Still a good story, though 😁

[–] HomerAtTheBat@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I miss read haha Ooo me read meme good

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

No worries, still managed to entertain 😁

[–] Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Creepypastas are generally like this :

  • protagonist Find, get gifted or buy cursed thing
  • cursed thing is tied to some kind of evil entity.
  • the evil entity is a regular mascot, an "original" one as in "random object" head or unique like slander man and it's countless copycats "random adjective" man. Entity have red, black eyes and/or blood coming everywhere.
  • evil entity tease the new owner and does evil things
  • owner try to remove the curse by throwing the object but it mysteriously come back
  • bad ending.
[–] HomerAtTheBat@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Does creepy pasta comes with free frogurt?

[–] Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It depends on the situation. If it was the year 2009 and you're a 14 old teenager sitting on his computer reading creepypastas on 4chan when dad comes home with a pack of frogurt, then possibly. Else, Not unless you buy them yourself.

[–] sharkfucker420@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You should check out the Magnus archives

[–] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"Oh shidd oh fugg dude is that a.. is that a heggin big angler fish??"

sweats profusely