Melbourne

I can relate to the loneliness and the feeling of drowning at work.

I don't have any real advice, but I hope you can find some peace soon ❤️

I've been in a similar place. Can you take some stress leave/sick leave? Ideally at least two weeks so that a) you can unwind properly and b) somebody else has to pick up the slack at work.

Do it now, not once project x is done or when we've met tgat bext deadline. New stuff will keep coming up.

I don't know what the answers are but you've got a friend in me. 💜

Everytime I press the red heart it comes up black. Maybe I've used up my red hearts quota or run out of red ink. 🤷‍♀️ anyway red heart, red heart, red heart.

I’m not sure what to say but feel very like this in other ways.

I’m wondering if there’s any way you can half ass some of the details a little bit so you don’t get stuck? I don’t know what you’re working on but sometimes done > perfect

Otherwise you’re well within your rights to insist on the time you’ve carved out so you don’t get dragged sideways.

Taking some leave in whatever form is a good idea because this sounds like burnout.

Whatever happens I wish you can get some peace of rest somehow, even for a moment.

Is stress leave a possibility for you?

Edit: Also, is there anyone close to you that can help with even the smallest of things at home?

so many hugs

maybe the world and your little part of the world would be a million times messier if not for you

like in Alice in Wonderland, we have to run just to keep in the same place

Since you can't delegate how about resetting your timetable?

On a positive note, it's good they want a grown up and do defer.

That sounds delightful. I too shall make scrambled eggs. (Coupled with leftover brisket)

Professional movers are the BEST..I never used them until I had to move at start of lockdown and it was the only choice and now I will scrimp and save and spend that money every time. I think they also love it when they only have a small move and you have taken the time to organise a bit.

You are nearly there!!!

Nic work.

I have cleaned the shower. Aiming to vacuum and put and load in, if I don’t lose my mind to the building works in the meantime.

I had a dream I didn't even do my assignment or read most of the subject material - oh wait, that's real. Should get back to that...

You sound super organised and motivated. I believe in you!

(Don’t be me. I’ve done enough of that for all of us.)

Assignments are scary. You've got this, Dan!! Props to you for doing a degree. Uni is tough, but you are tougher :)

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time mate. I was with my mother through her difficulties and you're right, it is heartbreaking.

It takes a real toll.

I hope everything works out ❤️

I’m so sorry. Aged, end of life or disability care can be brutal especially when it’s your mum. Definitely get some carers in to help share the load

gees, so many hugs.

You shouldn't be doing this and in the past your dad shouldn't have asked you to do that.

I suggest getting a nurse or aid in to do a lot of that. Contact the hospital about organising one.

and hugs again.

Mate, that's definitely a lot to wear on your own. It's a very delicate situation to navigate. I have absolutely nothing useful to add except that you're an incredibly awesome human and as everyone else has said do talk to others about it (vent here, to a friend, a shrink...) You shouldn't have to go through this alone. I hope this difficult time will eventually (even if painfully at first) bring forward some vulnerability and openness from all parties. Big hugs 🫂

Easier said than done, but you need to allow yourself the space to just be outside this dynamic. This is new territory for everyone and even for those that work in field. We can think or imagine how we’re going to respond or handle something like this, but the truth is we never know until we are in the moment.

I hope that you have people close where you can express this. It might also not be what your father wants to hear right now, but it sounds like your mother needs him as a husband and not a doctor right now. The sooner he hears that, the better. She’s probably scared and she needs to feel like she is more than someone who needs to be treated. You know, patient centered care and being holistic and all that…

Sending you the biggest hugs. Please talk to friends/loved ones/or other if you can.

Heart goes out to you Racer. Navigating this will be a challenge for anyone. We are here for support and venting. There is still a chance that your mum will recover more than present situation too. Sending healing vibes.
You'll need to be there for your dad too - sounds like he might need someone to model how to be human/emotional too. Which is lot to ask but there's not a chance in hell that he'll seek outside professional advice methinks.

So many hugs. Healing is hard, and it takes a lot of time.