this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2024
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Memes

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 56 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] ulterno@lemmy.kde.social 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I am having difficulty understanding whether it broke its own cycle and is now crying, or broke someone else's cycle and is now being intimidating.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Technically the first one (clown costume implies he's an entertainer), but I feel like either interpretation works

It's a penny farthing, so he probably fell off and it hurt really bad so now he's crying.

[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 47 points 1 month ago
[–] smitten@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It’s actually not too easy to ride at 30km/h

[–] GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Presumably the hippo also needs to ride a bike on that stretch, so they probably aren't managing their full running speed.

[–] myliltoehurts@lemm.ee 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You're right, they're probably faster than their running speed given humans are faster on a bicycle than running too.

[–] GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe if you engineered some new pedal vehicle that is no longer really a bike, but hippos have neither the build nor the kind of gross motor skills (or prehensile forelimbs) needed to be successful as a high-level bicyclist.

[–] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] lime@feddit.nu 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)
[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] dubyakay@lemmy.ca 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Probably shit, like most mammals.

Edit: I looked it up, and they can maintain 29-40km/h charge for about 150m.

[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago

Whelp, I'm dead. GG hippo.

[–] prunerye 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Technically, hippos don't swim. They run along the ground. So if you pick a deep enough body of water, you might still have a chance.

[–] abbadon420@lemm.ee 2 points 1 month ago

If I was the Hippo, I wouldn't simply agree on "Let's do a triathlon, but I'll pick the locations"

[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This reads like Deep Thoughts... by Jack Handey

[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago

"If God dwells inside us, like some people say, I sure hope he likes enchiladas, because that’s what he’s getting."

[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Are these hippo sprint speeds, or real proper endurance speeds?

[–] blind3rdeye@lemm.ee 17 points 1 month ago

There's no way hippos have the long-distance endurance of humans. Pretty much everything is faster than humans at sprinting, but for endurance running, humans are next level. (Not me of course, I'm not really fit enough to be called human in this context.)

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Ima be honest it can probably beat me on a bicycle as well.

[–] MacStache@programming.dev 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Hippos can't swim. Too much bone density and mass.

[–] portuga@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You clearly never been hunted by a hippo on water

[–] 0ops@lemm.ee 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No they're right, they literally just run and jump underwater

Yet despite all these adaptations for life in the water, hippos can't swim—they can't even float! Their bodies are far too dense to float, so they move around by pushing off from the bottom of the river or simply walking along the riverbed in a slow-motion gallop, lightly touching the bottom with their toes, which are slightly webbed, like aquatic ballet dancers.

https://animals.sandiegozoo.org/animals/hippo

Honestly that's scarier to me

[–] GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe that's why they're "water horses", because they gallop underwater.

[–] portuga@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Yeah, not disputing that, but try to tell them while they’re eating your skull like it’s a watermelon snack

Edit: I know they’re herbivores. Doesn’t change the facts

[–] GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh certainly, they'll fuck you up way more readily and viscerally than a horse ever would, I just always wondered about the logic of their name.

[–] portuga@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Yeah water horse sounds right

[–] BruceTwarzen@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago

Man, i actually have in a little riverboat in kenya. It's absolutely terrifying. There were some other tourists on the boat who treated it like a circus show the hippo did for them. They cheered every time it jumped out of the water getting closer and closer. I was sitting very close to the boat captain, who was sweating bullets.

Are you required to "swim" in the traithlon, or do you have to do a distance across a body of water?

[–] sub_ubi@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

i dunno I just watched phelps vs shark and I think he beats a hippo

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I thought "gun" was party of the tri.

[–] lengau@midwest.social 10 points 1 month ago

You're thinking of biathlon, with cross country skiing and rifle.