Well, I’m late. I f’ed up and binged over the weekend and am just barely starting to not feel awful. I’ve learned I just can’t drink. Moderation doesn’t work for me. Ive rerealized I’ve been self medicating as well. I’m going to find a therapist and talk to them and my doctor about maybe finally trying some antidepressants. Wish me luck folks. I will not drink with you today
this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2024
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evening friends, rehabs going well made lots of friends. about to crack day 6, the booze withdrawals are gone thank crikey but insomnia is still in full swing I've had about 15 hours sleep in the last week, been drinking shitloads of coffee cause I get sleep anxiety cause I know im going to get the nightmare. trying a new medication called zopiclone which is supposed to knock me tf out but nothing yet. and another new antidepressant I can't remember the name of. got a number to enquire about a prescription for thc oil for the nightmares so I can finally stop spending fortunes on weed which I planned to quit anyway
it's clear benzos don't work anymore, so I can't safely detox anymore. it's crystal clear I can never drink again.
im going full send into AA, the current chair stepped down after interrupting someone's share and ruined the meeting and her interest in ever going to meetings again, he apologized to everyone including the sharer who was so embarrassed she stormed out crying but she didn't accept his apology SO I've been studying the guide and preamble and am ready to have a crack at working on my public speaking and social skills. very excited. 3 days til the next meeting, wee bit nervy! I've only been to like 20 meetings but ive got a fair idea of what to do.
ive had the big book sitting on my mantelpiece for 6+ years and I always thought yeah I'll crack it open one of these days, well I haven't been able to put it down. some stuffs dated and disagreeable but y'know, 1939. anyway I just started writing down bits that really resonated with me but eventually I just started copying it on paper word for word to make it really stick. about 20 pages in. very cathartic to just write and concentrate.
only had like 6 cigarettes today down from my usual 30, it's just too far to walk I cbf hahaha.
my parents are coming up this wknd with my german shepard Maia and everyones so hyped to meet her
hope you all have/had a lovely day and I wanna share this quote that made me burst into tears
HOW DARK IT IS BEFORE THE DAWN!
I hope the zopiclone works for you. quit drinking coffee!!! LOL (as I finish my third cup because I cannot stay awake) Stopping smoking is doubly AWESOME, very proud of you there too. :)
thanks, it didn't. 3.5hrs sleep im so fucking tired, but probably because starting dose they're going to talk to my psyche to see if they can up it.
It’s morning time for you right now correct? What sessions do you have today?
addiction and the brain, then life matters and mindfulness. but i feel like a dead man walking I won't be engaging.
Good afternoon, fellow sobernauts, IWNDWYT 😁!
Jet lag?
not too bad, actually, more i didn't want to step on your toes by posting the DCI when I woke up 😁
Post away! I thought you had a very late arrival lol
Morning, people! I will not drink with you today.