Melbourne

Can I just have a fucking break? I put a cat down three weeks ago, and now a dog has fucking cancer?

Can I just get a month where nothing fucking goes wrong?

House now in possession of a calendar of semi clad firemen with cats. Not my fault.

Sorry for the trauma dumping yesterday. I feel a bit less shit(mentally) today I think.

Physically I feel like complete shit lmao. Might be coming down with something. We'll see.

On my street, the massed chorus of lawnmowers, whippersnippers and blowers has just started up. Right now it's fairly minor, but I predict it will reach a crescendo later on today.

I’ve just caught up on the Australian breakdancer. It’s so very bad. The sprinkler and the play school kangaroo hop moves were great, but the sprayed roach was glorious. I watched on repeat laughing. 5 stars.

I've been seeing that cute fluffy cat from may around on the camera feed a lot. It seems to visit us a lot, I'm not sure if it always has, and I'm only noticing because of the camera saving the video, or if it's gotten lost

In any case, I got a notification that it's in the backyard so I went out and gave it some scritcheys. Then it was gone just as quick as it came. It seems to have a routine though, it comes in from the driveway, walls last the front camera, sniffs some plants, then goes down the side of the house, squeezes through a gap in the gate, pops up on the back camera a couple of minutes later, goes to the other side of the house, does who knows what there, then does it all again in reverse.

Sounds like I've been adopted! Obligatory photos (same ones posted in may, I didn't take any today):

Nice lunch and a few beers with friends in the city 👌 english pub Sunday roast goes hard

Oh no. While constructing my mega mousse I think the chocolate cooled down too much and it looks spotty. It tastes delicious though. Ah well. You live and learn and laugh.

i didn’t know i miss hanging out with people my age that much

Something just clicked for me with this "raygun" contraversy: Its the outfit. I mean the dancing is... whatever look I'm not one to judge anyones dancing I still cant figure out "Big Fish Little Fish Cardboard Box". But the green and gold getup is OK for a a cricketer or something, but just embarassing for a dancing routine!

*shitty mood COVID rant

Still no smell or taste. Busied myself with laundry and mopping to try and stop being angry. Can't go out in the backyard for too long because MIL had a dude over to cut down the bottlebrush tree and rip half the garden out. She hasn't got a plan really, just felt like replacing half the garden beds with more bloody lawn 🤦🏼‍♀️. It wasn't necessary and looks shithouse, just like the barren wasteland of a front garden I try not to look at. Still strongly positive test, looks like I'm out of work until at least Wednesday. As a casual worker this isn't good.

Lovely day out with friends - love youuuu

I confess: I was up all night playing contraband police (I was stuck on a level and it was annoying me), playing some missionchief, and messing around with JavaScript and python.

I don't understand JavaScript and evidently chatgpt doesn't either, because my attempt at modifying a chrome extension didn't quite work. But I used it to create a python script to take a few dozen JSON files from a web scraper, de-duplicate them, and output it to a CSV file, which can then be imported to google sheets and bulk archived onto the Wayback machine

Facebook's AI search suggestions are crazy. Just saw one suggesting I might want to look for "mayo related customer service stories".

Ever since, I deleted InstaGratification and Tik Toxic, I've noticed (finally) that my doomscrolling on those apps has been replaced with the following:

• opening 500 tabs of long form videos and reading the comments to find out what the video talks about. Most of these videos are things to do with self-help, which I am exhausted learning about from information overload. It's like watching how to stop procrastinating videos and inadvertently using them to procrastinate. Trying to find out how I can do the work on myself is stopping me from actually doing the work.

• compulsively googling every thought I have. This has lead me back to the other place, because a Redditor from seven years ago has had the exact same experience as I'm having. I think it's doing more harm than good though, and am thinking of avoiding Reddit altogether. I played my keyboard and ukulele for a bit, even though I have next to no dexterity, and I felt way more at peace doing that than actually trying to reassure myself that I'm going to be better by reading advice on how to be better.

The people in my life use junk content on social media to switch off, but my brain has been switched off for so long. It's time to get into the real world. Maybe one day I'll be able to be indoctrinated into Big Social Media again, and use it in a healthy way. Not today. Not tomorrow. Or the next day.

People in Carlton shouldn't be allowed to wear black if they insist on jaywalking.

Australia is so beautiful, the colours are just incredible. ISS film footage from July. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojbBLENz15s

Stayed in bed for an alarming amount of time today watching Fast Forward and Full Frontal clips after someone on the other site mentioned that the infamous breakdancing reminded them of Jane Turner doing gymnastics as Berylina Stumpy...

Why do I sabotage myself like this! Spent a very large part of a very fine day in bed, when I actually HAD energy to do other things if I'd just put away the phone. Could've indulged in videos at night instead. Now I am behind on stuff for next week. At least I got a brisk 30min walk in rather than sitting in negativity.

The morning sun is out. I’ve taken the deck chair and I’m outside while having lots of toast!

Coffee incoming soon too.

Been awhile since I’ve been able to do this.

Edit. And what giveth, it taketh away too. Just dropped one slice of toast :(

I'll take the kids on a other ride with the bicycle users group today if everything works out.

We went on one a few months ago and haven't made it since from a mix of the weather, being sick, and other plans.

They're a good group so I don't want to be one and done with them

Beep Beep 🚚
🍏🍎🍐🍊🍋🍈🫐🍓🍇🍉🍌🍒🍑🥭🍍🥥🥦🥑🫛🍆🍅🥝🥬🥒🌽🥕🥐🍠🫚🥔🧅🥯🍞🥖🥨🧀🧇🥞🧈🍳🥚🥓🥩🍗🍖🫓🍕🍟🍔🌭🥙🧆🌮🌯🥗🍲🍜🍝🥘🍛🍣🍱🥟🦪🍥🍘🍚🍙🐠🍤🪼🦀🐙 🍗🥮🍢🍡🍧🍰🧁🥧🍦🍨🎂🍮🍭🍬🍫🥜🌰🍪🍿🍯🥛☕️🍵🍺🍶🥤🧋🧃🥂🍷🥃🍸🍹🧉🔋

Still got a lot of stuff piled around in boxes and was too tired to tackle it last weekend, so I will resist the lure of the beach and work on it today.

I’m trying to force myself to sort out everything that’s been allowed to slide, take care of myself better, but am getting really anxious in the process. I keep running out of energy after doing something.

Also spending even on essentials is stressing me out. I’m still doing alright (touch wood) but it feels like another financial hit is always right around the corner and it induces a kind of panic. At this point I think it’s just ingrained. If you’re not aggressively saving you might regret it.

The Seine is the river that keeps on giving. Warning don't read this if you're eating your breakfast.

https://www.nine.com.au/sport/olympics/paris-2024-german-open-water-swimmer-leonie-beck-falls-ill-10km-seine-river-20240811-p5k1e6.html

Awake after some very strange but weirdly satisfying dreams (ok one brief nightmare at 12 about escaping my dad - but felt good to remind myself I'm quite safe here and have choices)

Feeling really good after yesterday, I think it must be the extra sun exposure. I take plenty of vit D but there must be something else about the sun that's just really good for the body...

Don't want to be up though, so I shall just snuggle in bed feeling grateful and secure reflecting on all the good things I've got

Anyone involved in support groups for chronic illness /pain? I have zero support group but feel validated seeing posts on instagram that mirror my experience.

The sunny sky today has given me a lighter mood. And is going to be 20C the next few days!

Sky pretty.

Procrastinating watching my uni lectures by trying to play Sweet Child O' Mine on the ukulele. I don't know how to read tabs.

Dog revoked his spot in the sun to lie to the shade. Spot stolen!

My sister and my aunt decided to get cinnamon rolls, so I am awaiting those.

Hopefully the rest of the day will be enjoyable.